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"I never knew that your name was James Gollop, and that you were a commercial man, until within the last five minutes! If there were need I could swear it." "Then," he demanded, blankly, "who in the deuce did you think I was, anyhow?" "I thought," she said with a slight shrug, "that you were Judge James Woodworth-Granger, of whom I suppose you have never heard.
But if I'm not mistaken, this same J. Woodworth-Granger, Judge by election, is after the scalp of one James Gollop, drummer for a living, and humph! wonder when the next train leaves that will take me out of this state's jurisdiction? It seems to me, Jim, that you should be on your way. Good Lord! Some men can never take a joke! The idea of raising such a fuss over a little thing like that!"
J. Woodworth-Granger will be the nominee for governor of this state, it is now dissipated by the scurrilous attack made upon him an attack of desperation that must and shall inevitably bring its own reward. Verily a man is known by the enemies he makes!" After reading this editorial Jimmy reverted to the news page where the faithful Tim's defense was given. It was eulogistic. It was colorful.
I'd send him clippings from interesting folks who make things for noses and tell how to grow eyebrows and how to flatten ears and make wide grins into sweet, diminutive smiles. I'd put him next to people who change gray eyes into brown ones, and purple eyes into greens. What on earth am I to do to get a passport into his state from J. Woodworth-Granger so I can keep my job?"
If you're really Judge Woodworth-Granger, I beg your pardon and think you ought to get your face changed for your own protection. If you're Jimmy Gollop and I'm a Dutchman if you aren't have some sense and quit your kidding. This has gone far enough! Look here, Jimmy, there's a limit to even one of your jokes. I can't stand for it to-day when my board of directors is coming.
If you ain't " He jerked off his cap, scratched his red head and added "If you ain't For the Lord's sake don't say nothin' " "Jimmy Gollop! A commercial traveler! Me?" the Judge actually spluttered and then, recovering all his overpowering magisterial arrogance, responded loftily, "I am J. Woodworth-Granger, Judge of the Fourth District Court.
Two men had entered the coach and taken the unoccupied seat immediately in front of him and one of them was Judge J. Woodworth-Granger. Jimmy looked for another place, but none was vacant. The train began to move and the fact that other men came through in quest of a seat, found none and stood up, convinced Jim of the futility of searching other coaches.
J. Woodworth-Granger at an important political meeting in the city of Yimville were not immediately forthcoming, legal action would be taken for damages, on the ground of misrepresentation, false pretense and willful intent to damage the reputation and political career of one of the most distinguished men in the state.
That brought him to another tormenting question, which was how long this affair had been going on. How long had the Judge been in town? How many times had he met and entertained her? And horrible condition! suppose of the two men she had learned to like Judge Woodworth-Granger better than James Gollop? That would be a tragedy.
He loitered in the hotel lobby long enough to read a bill announcing that there would be a mass meeting that night in the "Grand Opera House" under the auspices of the Princetown Municipal Improvement League and then saw in big letters, that the meeting would be addressed by "His Honor, Judge J. Woodworth-Granger."
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