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Does the aspiring and perspiring summer vaudeville artist flatter himself that his stuff is going big? Then does the stout man with the oyster-colored eyelids in the first row, left, turn his bullet head on his fat-creased neck to remark huskily to his companion: "The hook for him. R-r-r-rotten! That last one was an old Weber'n Fields' gag. They discarded it back in '91.

No wonder that the worthy Duc de Gramont doats on his grandchildren, and never seems so happy as with his excellent son and daughter-in-law. Went to the Vaudeville Théâtre last evening, to see the new piece by Scribe, so much talked of, entitled Avant, Pendant, et Aprés.

The Vaudeville begins well. Carvalho up to now has been charming. His enthusiasm is so strong even that I am not without anxieties. One must remember the good Frenchmen who cried "On to Berlin," and then received such a fine drubbing.

'There's a sportsman there who mixes things he calls "lightning whizzers". Something tells me I need one now. And excuse me for one minute, Gussie. I want to send a cable. It was clear to me by now that Aunt Agatha had picked the wrong man for this job of disentangling Gussie from the clutches of the American vaudeville profession. What I needed was reinforcements.

So I think I grew a bit out there talking to that water-giant who does nothing at all not even a vaudeville stunt and does it so masterfully. By and by they'll build a hotel in the flat at the edge of the lower basin; plant prim flowers in very prim beds; and rob you on the genteel European plan.

Martainville was not in the secret of certain understandings made and ratified amid after-dinner jokes, or at Dauriat's in the Wooden Galleries, or behind the scenes at the Vaudeville, when journalists of either side met on neutral ground.

The pale and youthful father of a family, with the face of Shelley, who wrote vaudeville turns for a living and blank verse tragedies and sonnet cycles for the despair of managers and publishers, hid himself in a concrete cell with three-foot walls, so piped, that, by turning a lever, the whole structure spouted water upon the impending intruder.

It was therefore thought wise to make use of other means, and I procured the assistance of a young German-American of my acquaintance, who, in the guise of a vaudeville artist seeking a job, went to the blackmailer's boarding-house and pretended to be looking for an actor friend with a name not unlike that of the criminal.

"Our young friend seems to have enviable youthful spirits," commented Mr. Boltwood. "Now, no superiority! He's probably never seen a real vaudeville show. Wouldn't it be fun to take him to the Winter Garden or the Follies for the first time!... Instead of being taken by Jeff Saxton, and having the humor, oh! so articulately explained!"

There were some of the young ladies, though, for whom I felt no liking Miss Pearl Pennington, who plays light leads, and her friend, Miss Laura Dixon, the ingenue." "They were in vaudeville until recently," remarked Alice. "So Russ told me. Miss Pennington seemed very pretty." "Passably so," agreed Mr. DeVere. "Well, our living problem is solved for us, anyway. Now I must study my new part.

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