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Folliard," said Smellpriest, "you don't know the value of that woman. When I return, for instance, after a hunt, the first question she puts to me is Well, my love, how many priests did you catch to-day? And out comes Mr. Strong with the same question. Strong, however, between ourselves, is a goose; he will believe any thing, and often sends me upon a cold trail.
Brown first, and the parish priest afterwards; Mr. Strong, who had been for several years conjoined to Mrs. Smellpriest, having been rejected by both parties as the officiating clergyman upon the occasion, although the lovely bride was certainly his parishioner.
"As for me, Smellpriest, I make no such distinctions; they are unworthy of you, and I'm sorry to hear you express them. I say, the man." "And I say, the priest," replied the other. "What do you say, my lord?" asked Mr. Folliard of the peer.
Smellpriest, I say, first began his career as a friend to the Papists; he took large tracts of land in their name, and even purchased a couple of estates with their money; and in due time, according as the tide continued to get strong against them, he thought the best plan to cover his villany ahem his policy, I mean was to come out as a fierce loyalist; and as a mark of his repentance, he claimed the property, as the real purchaser, and arrested those who were fools enough to trust him."
"But, in the meantime," proceeded the squire, "I am not without support. Here is Lady Joram and Mrs. Smellpriest and Mrs. Oxley and they are a host in themselves each of them willing and ready to support me."
Indeed Captain Smellpriest, she added, was under great obligations to him, for no sooner had his reverence heard of a priest taking earth in the neighborhood, than he lost no time in communicating the fact to her husband; after which he would kindly sit with and comfort her whilst fretting lest any mischief might befall her dear captain. The dinner passed as all dinners usually do.
Smellpriest, however, differed from Whitecraft in many points; he was brave, though cruel, and addicted to deep potations.
"Our day of doom," said he to himself, "is come. Nothing now can save us." Still the bishop proceeded undisturbed in the worship of the Almighty; when, lo! the military party, headed and led on by the notorious Captain Smellpriest, came thundering up, the captain exclaiming: "You idolatrous Papist, stop that mummery or you shall have twelve bullets in your heart before half a minute's time."
You know not how those rascals can disguise themselves." "And you blame them, Smellpriest," said the squire, "for disguising themselves?
"Ay, thunder away, only don't injure my gate, Smellpriest, or I'll make you replace it; bawl yourselves hoarse you are on the wrong side for once!" When they were approaching the hall-door, which generally lay open "Confound me," said the squire, "if I know what to do with you; I trust in God I won't get into odium by this.
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