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Updated: July 4, 2025
MacGrawler, I shall get nothing for my trouble?" said Paul. "To be sure not, sir; the very best writer in 'The Asinaeum' only gets three shillings an article!" Almost more than he deserves, the critic might have added; for he who writes for nobody should receive nothing!
Certain it is that there are few vices which cannot be conquered by wisdom; and yet, melancholy to relate, the instructions of Peter MacGrawler produced but slender amelioration in the habits of the youthful Paul.
He pointed out, with a clear brevity, the various points of the evidence; he dwelt for a moment on the attempt to cast disrepute upon the testimony of MacGrawler, but called a proper attention to the fact that the attempt had been unsupported by witnesses or proof.
He trusted the sage with the secret of the cavern; and Augustus, who was a bit of an epicure, submitted, though forebodingly, to the choice, because of the Scotchman's skill in broiling. But MacGrawler, like Brutus, concealed a scheming heart under a stolid guise.
Paul's wish therefore was no sooner expressed than a vague but golden scheme of future profit illumined the brain of MacGrawler, in a word, he resolved that Paul should henceforward share the labour of his critiques; and that he, MacGrawler, should receive the whole profits in return for the honour thereby conferred on his coadjutor. Looking therefore at our hero with a benignant air, Mr.
And then it was that Paul, made conceited by praise, said, looking contemptuously in the face of his preceptor, and swinging his legs to and fro, "And what, sir, shall I receive for the plastered Epic and the slashed Inquiry?" MacGrawler at the abrupt and astounding audacity of Paul. "Receive!" he repeated, "receive!
"Part!" said the subtilizing Tomlinson. "He has nine times as many parts as we have already. Is he not a critic, and has he not the parts of speech at his fingers' end?" "Nonsense!" said MacGrawler, instinctively holding up his hands, with the fork dropping between the outstretched fingers of the right palm. "Nonsense yourself," cried Ned; "you have a share in what you never took!
Our heroes offered to the sage an introduction to their club; the offer was accepted; and MacGrawler, having been first made drunk, was next made a robber.
MacGrawler only, escaping, like Theodore from the enormous helmet of Otranto, MacGrawler only survived. "Love," says Sir Philip Sidney, "makes a man see better than a pair of spectacles." Love of life has a very different effect on the optics, it makes a man wofully dim of inspection, and sometimes causes him to see his own property in another man's purse!
The pair now sat down to their repast; and Paul, who had fared but meagerly in that Temple of Athena over which MacGrawler presided, did ample justice to the viands before him.
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