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But, in reminder of those hours, his lamp was still burning. He extinguished it; and the going-out of that tarnished light made perfect his sense of release. He threw wide his arms in welcome of the great adorable day, and of all the great adorable days that were to be his. He leaned out from his window, drinking the dawn in. The gods had made merry over him, had they?
There had been a pathetic ring there. She had murmured a gentle rebuke; her eyes had brimmed, reproaching him. It was then that he had taken her hand, at the going-out from the fig- house. "Ruth," he had said, "my kind, pretty Ruth." Then he stooped his head and kissed her. Through three pairs of doors Glyde, in the peachhouse, had seen the act, and paused in his spraying. It was over in a minute.
"You are quite wet, child." "No, I must go out again at once," Ellen replied. "I only wanted to peep in." "But it's really very late," grumbled Stolpe. "Are you only off duty now?" "Yes, it's not my going-out day." "Not to-day again? Yes, it's sheer slavery, till eleven at night!" "That's the way things are, and it doesn't make it any better for you to scold me," said Ellen courageously.
I suppose that quite at the first there were simple curiosities; no doubt they were vivid at the time but they have left scarcely a trace; there were vague first intimations of a peculiar excitement. I do remember more distinctly phases when there was a going-out from myself towards these things, these interests, and then a reaction of shame and concealment.
Thus it was of the utmost importance to get safely over the precarious part of the 'road' before the seasonal going-out of the sea-ice. To wait until all the ice should go out and enable the ship to sail to Hut Point would have meant long uncertainty and delay. As it happened, the Road broke up the day after the party had gone by. Viz.
"You are quite wet, child." "No, I must go out again at once," Ellen replied. "I only wanted to peep in." "But it's really very late," grumbled Stolpe. "Are you only off duty now?" "Yes, it's not my going-out day." "Not to-day again? Yes, it's sheer slavery, till eleven at night!" "That's the way things are, and it doesn't make it any better for you to scold me," said Ellen courageously.
He seemed fairly to see his own mortality that gate of death which lay wide open for him. Yet, all at once, a sense of peace and trust almost ineffable came over him. Death seemed merely the going-out into the true open, the essence of the moonlight and the beauty.
It consisted of the more enduring ice in the bays and the sea-ice along the coast, which only stayed fast for the season. Thus it was most important to get safely over the dangerous part of this Road before the seasonal going-out of the sea-ice. To wait until after the ice went out and the ship could sail to Hut Point would have meant both uncertainty and delay.
Then, in the middle, over the fireplace, shall be 'our picture. Over each door shall hang one of the lithographed angel-heads of the San Sisto, to watch our going-out and coming-in; and the glorious Mother and Child shall hang opposite the Venus di Milo, to show how Greek and Christian unite in giving the noblest type to womanhood.
She had no longer time to think of herself, or to stand and question the Lord on every going-out and coming-in. She relied upon Him as much as ever, but she understood Him better, and had more faith in His loving-kindness. In a letter to T. D. Weld, she says:
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