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Updated: June 8, 2025
To his sensitive ear the words had sounded exactly like the opening line of the refrain of a vaudeville song-hit. He decided to waste no further speech on a man with such an unfortunate surname until he could see him face to face and get a chance of lowering his voice a bit. Absolutely absurd to stand outside a chappie's door singing song-hits in a lemon-coloured bathing suit.
It looked as if Motty, after seeing mother off at the station, had decided to call it a day. Jeeves came in with the nightly whisky-and-soda. I could tell by the chappie's manner that he was still upset. "Lord Pershore gone to bed, Jeeves?" I asked, with reserved hauteur and what-not. "No, sir. His lordship has not yet returned." "Not returned? What do you mean?"
There are moments in a chappie's life, don't you know, when Reason, so to speak, totters, as it were, on its bally throne. This was one of them. The situation seemed somehow to have got out of my grip. I suppose, strictly speaking, I ought, at this juncture, to have cleared my throat and said in an audible tone, "Harold, old top, I know where Ponsonby is." But somehow I couldn't.
"But lots of fellows have asked me who my tailor is." "Doubtless in order to avoid him, sir." "He's supposed to be one of the best men in London." "I am saying nothing against his moral character, sir." I hesitated a bit. I had a feeling that I was passing into this chappie's clutches, and that if I gave in now I should become just like poor old Aubrey Fothergill, unable to call my soul my own.
"Abominably lazy! Every opportunity family, education brains, perhaps. Why don't you go to work?" "My few and simple wants " Boland waved his hand airily. "Besides, who am I that I should crowd to the wall some worthy and industrious person? practically taking the bread from the chappie's mouth, you might say. No, no!" said Mr. Boland with emotion; "I may have my faults, but "
Bickersteth intends I judge from his remarks to signify his appreciation of anything I have been fortunate enough to do to assist him, at some later date when he is in a more favourable position to do so." "It isn't enough, Jeeves!" "Sir?" It was a wrench, but I felt it was the only possible thing to be done. "Bring my shaving things." A gleam of hope shone in the chappie's eye, mixed with doubt.
You have a singer straining at the leash. I'm going to arrange with this egg who leads the orchestra that your female shall sing my chappie's song downstairs one night during dinner. How about it? Is it or is it not a ball of fire?" "It's not a bad idea," admitted Bill, brightening visibly. "I wouldn't have thought you had it in you." "Why not?" "Well " "It's a capital idea," said Lucille.
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