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Updated: June 19, 2025
I don't want you PERMANENTLY, but only for a day, or two days at most, because our cook has left." "Arrah, ma'am, you said your cook was Susan Hastings! Yer a quare leddy, I'm thinkin', an' yer husband here, is another! Sthrivin' to entice away a cook as is satisfied wid her place, and who manes honest by her employers!"
Well, he was not well in it when all the rest iv them comes into the kitchen, an' ould Tim Donovan singin' the 'Colleen Rue' for the bare life, an' the rest iv them sthrivin' to humour him, and doin' exactly everything he bid them, because they seen he was foolish be the manes iv the liquor.
Well, his raverence tould the ould people then, there was no use in sthrivin' agin the will iv Providence an' the vagaries iv love united; an' whin they kem to undherstand to a sartinty how Billy had a shillin' a day for the rest iv his days, begorra they took rather a likin' to him, and considhered at wanst how he must have riz out of all his nansinse entirely, or his gracious Majesty id never have condescinded to show him his countenance that way every day of his life, on a silver shillin'.
'Arra, what are ye sthrivin' to say, says Bill; says he, 'if ye don't hould your tongue, says he, 'wid your parly voo; says he, 'it's what I'll put my thumb on your windpipe, says he, 'an' Billy Malowney never wint back iv his word yet, says he.
'That bates all I ever seen or heerd, says the colonel, sthrivin' to rally and make another offer; 'is there anything you can't do? 'Nothing you can tell me, says the divil, 'so you may as well leave off your palaverin' and come along at wanst. 'Will you give me one more offer, says the colonel.
But isn't that nonsense, says I? If ye split up the land into patches as big as yer hand and give every man a patch, wouldn't some men have twenty or a hundred, or maybe a thousand patches in five years? An' thin, thim that was lazy an' wasteful an' got out o' their land would be for shootin' the savin', sthrivin' man that worked his way up by buying out the drones.
He was a savin', sthrivin' man, an' he married a woman wid money. He had a foine shop, wid ploughs, an' sickles, an' spades for the whole counthry round. 'Twas a grand business he had, an' he made a powerful dale o' money. He was a quiet man, an' niver wint to the whiskey shops, where the boys they would be quarrellin' an' knockin' hell out iv each other.
Don't you know the differ, Sir, between a threat an' a warnin', you bosthoon? thundered his reverence. 'You're sthrivin' to provoke me to a brache iv the pace, as the company can testify, said Dirty Davy. 'Ye lie again, you you fat crature 'tis thryin' to provoke you to keep the pace I am.
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