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Updated: September 27, 2025
One of them was chiefly given to uncleanness, another to drunkenness, and the third to purloining, or stealing from his master. ATTEN. Alas! poor wretch, he was bad enough before, but these, I suppose, made him much worse. WISE. That they made him worse you may be sure of, for they taught him to be an arch, a chief one in all their ways.
ATTEN. God knows there is abundance of deceit in the world! WISE. Deceit! Ay, but I have not told you the thousandth part of it; nor is it my business now to rake to the bottom of that dunghill.
ATTEN. This beginning was bad, and yet I fear it was but the beginning of bad.
ATTEN. Had he then such a good trade, for all he was such a bad man? Or was his calling so gainful to him as always to keep his purse's belly full, though he was himself a great spender? WISE. No, it was not his trade that did it, though he had a pretty trade too. He had another way to get money, and that by hatfuls and pocketfuls at a time. ATTEN. Why I trow he was no highwayman, was he?
WISE. With all my heart will I proceed to give you a relation of what is yet behind of his life, in order to our discourse of his death. ATTEN. But pray, do it with as much brevity as you can. WISE. Why, are you weary of my relating of things? ATTEN. No: but it pleases me to hear a great deal in few words.
ATTEN. That is a deadly thing: I mean, it is a deadly thing to young men, when such beastly queens shall, with words and carriages that are openly tempting, discover themselves unto them; it is hard for such to escape their snare. For they are, as you say, very tempting, as is seen by her in the Proverbs.
He would also charged her with giving of what he had to her ministers, when, vile wretch, he had spent it on his vain companions before. This was the life that Mr. Badman's good wife lived, within few months after he had married her. ATTEN. This was a disappointment indeed. WISE. A disappointment indeed, as ever I think poor woman had.
ATTEN. This brings to my mind a man that a friend of mine told me of. He had been a wicked liver; so when he came to die, he fell into despair; and having concluded that God had no mercy for him, he addressed himself to the devil for favour, saying, Good devil, be good unto me.
ATTEN. But do not bad masters condemn themselves in condemning the badness of their servants? And the time will come when that very sentence that hath gone out of their own mouths against the sins of others, themselves living and taking pleasure in the same, shall return with violence upon their own pates. This is Mr. Badman's master's case; he is like his man, and yet he beats him.
ATTEN. It must needs be so as you say, if these things be true that you have asserted of him. And I do the rather believe them, because I think you dare not tell a lie of the dead. WISE. I was one of them that went to him and that beheld his carriage and manner of way, and this is a true relation of it that I have given you. ATTEN. I am satisfied.
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