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Updated: June 22, 2025
"I haven't fallen over forty children a minute in the street with their ridiculous parcels, and I haven't had women drop brown-paper bundles that come undone all over me when they crowd into the horse car, and I haven't found it impossible to get to the shirt-collar counter on account of Christmas novelties! Oh, no, I didn't know it was Christmas!"
He loosened his soft shirt-collar and was ready. All of Bud Lee's simple preparations had been made when he threw his broad hat aside. Then came the little pause which is forerunner to the first blow, when two men measure each other, seeking each to read the other's purpose.
He may be known by two infallible signs, his hands are fat, and he tucks his napkin into his shirt-collar. In spite of these idiosyncrasies, he seemed to me a reserved and inoffensive person, with singularly little of the demonstrative good-humor that he has been described as possessing.
"Every dog has his day," we say, and we are impatient of a man who declines to step into retirement the moment that his hair turns gray, to make room for some specimen of Young America with a snub nose and a smart shirt-collar. Now, however this irreverence may be justified and it is not only justified but shamelessly gloried in it is not poetical. Poetry cannot be woven of improprieties.
That is my firm belief," said the shilling. There was once a fine gentleman who possessed among other things a boot-jack and a hair-brush; but he had also the finest shirt-collar in the world, and of this collar we are about to hear a story. The collar had become so old that he began to think about getting married; and one day he happened to find himself in the same washing-tub as a garter.
Conspicuous among those gathered on the wharf was a diminutive little dandy, with an olive-colored frock-coat, black pants, embroidered vest, and an enormous shirt-collar that endangered his ears.
He found that gentleman in the solitary tea-room, pacing up and down before the observant landlady and handmaidens of the "Gorgon Arms," wiping his brows, gnawing his fingers his ears looming over his stiff white shirt-collar as red as fire. Once more the great man seized John Perkins's hand as the latter came up. "D the aristocrats!" roared the ex-follower of Squaretoes.
'I am proud to know you, and I ask your pardon, said the gentleman, touching his hat, and subsequently diving behind his cravat for a shirt-collar, which however he did not succeed in bringing to the surface. 'You behold in me, sir, one who has also an interest in that gentleman upstairs. Wait a bit.
"'Twas conspirator very conspirator," assented Old Zeb, screwing up his A string a trifle, and turning con spirito into a dark saying. "What's that?" "Greek for elbow-grease. Phew!" He rubbed his fore-finger round between neck and shirt-collar. "I be vady as the inside of a winder." "Such a man as you be to sweat, crowder!" exclaimed Calvin Oke.
He rolled once more the whole length of the leads, turned over Jane's stool, and upset her work-basket, so that her thimble bounded off to a far corner, and the shirt-collar she was stitching fell over into the water-butt. "There! What will Jane say?" cried Agnes, picking up the basket, and peeping over into the small part of the top of the water-butt which was not covered.
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