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Updated: June 17, 2025
'Or else she means this for the final stroke: "though I'm lying here, I can still make him feel." That, or poor woman she has her notions of right and wrong. 'Could we not now travel for a few weeks, Victor? 'Certainly, dear; we will, after we have kept our engagements to dine I accepted with the Blathenoys, the Blachingtons, Beaver Urmsing.
'Hem'd fool I am to keep appointments! he muttered. She reproved him: 'Fie, Mr. Urmsing; it's the making of them, not the keeping! 'Ah, my dear ma'am, if I'd had Blathenoy's luck when he made a certain appointment. And he was not so much older than me? The old ones get the prizes! Mr. Beaves Urmsing prompted Colonel Corfe to laugh in triumph.
All to further science! to which, in spite of the petitions of all the scientific bodies of the civilized world, he fell a martyr on the scaffold, poor gentleman! But we know politics to be no such empirical science. Simeon ingeniously interwove his analogy. He brought it home to Beaves Urmsing, whose laugh drove any tone of apology out of it.
Then she turned to a fresh satellite, a round and a ruddy, 'at her service ever, Mr. Beaves Urmsing, and repeated Fenellan's words. He, in unfeigned wonderment at such unsuspected powers, cried: 'Dear me! and stared at the little man, making the pretty lady's face a twinkling dew. He had missed the Concert. Was it first-rate? Ecstasy answered in the female voice.
Beaves Urmsing brutally addressed the colonel, 'that you were at Eton when... why, what age do you give the poor woman, then! He bellowed, 'Eh? as it were a bull crowing. The colonel retreated to one of his defensive corners. 'I am not aware that I meant to tell you anything. Mr. Beaves Urmsing turned square-breasted on Fenellan: 'Fellow's a born donkey! 'And the mother lived? said Fenellan.
Pempton knew something of this quaint Squire of Hefferstone, Beaves Urmsing by name; a ruddy man, right heartily Saxon; a still glowing brand amid the ashes of the Heptarchy hearthstone; who had a song, The Marigolds, which he would troll out for you anywhere, on any occasion. To have so near to the metropolis one from the centre of the venerable rotundity of the country, was rare.
Mr. Beaves Urmsing puffed with wrath at the fellow. Five minutes later, in the midst of the group surrounding and felicitating Victor, he had sight of Fenellan conversing with fair ones, and it struck a light in him; he went three steps backward, with shouts. 'Dam funny fellow! eh? who is he? I must have that man at my table. Worth fifty Colonel Jackasses!
Beaves Urmsing grew courtly of the olden time. He spied Colonel Corfe anew, and 'Donkey! rose to split the roar at his mouth, and full of his anecdote, he pursued some congenial acquaintances, crying to his host: 'Wednesday, mind! eh? by George, your friend's gizzarded me for the day!
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