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Updated: August 20, 2024
He knows he's fit for it. He's sthronger thin th' young lawyer they have now. People'll listen to him in Wash'nton as they do in Chicago. He says: 'I'll take it. An' thin he thinks iv th' wife an' they's no Wash'nton f'r him. His pollytical career is over. He wud niver have been constable if he hadn't marrid, but he might have been sinitor if he was a widower." "Mrs.
Th' Sicrety iv th' Threeasury has declared, that Mr. Bryan in sayin' that silver is not convartible be th' terms iv th' Slatthry bankin' law iv 1870, an' th' sicond clause iv th' threaty iv Gansville, has committed th' onpard'nable pollytical sin iv so consthructin' th' facts as to open up th' possibility iv wan not knowin' th' thrue position iv affairs, misundhersthandin' intirely.
Did ye r-read it? he says. 'I did, says I. 'What did ye think iv it? says he. 'I know, says I, 'why more people don't go to church, says I." "I see," said Mr. Hennessy, "that Dewey is a candydate f'r prisidint." "Well, sir" said Mr. Dooley, "I hope to hiven he won't get it. No rilitive iv mine iver held a pollytical job barrin' mesilf.
Th' minyit a Mormon thries to break into a pollytical job, a dillygation rises an' says they: 'What! they says, 'permit this polluted monsther f'r to invade th' chaste atmosphere, they says, 'iv th' house iv riprisintatives, they says. 'Permit him f'r to parade his fam'ly down Pinnsylvanya Av'noo an' block thraffic, they says.
Well, whin I've injooced him to take a bowl iv red liquor f'r in his time th' dhrink was white an' explained how th' seltzer comes out an' th' cash raygisther wurruks, an' wather is dhrawn fr'm th' fassit, an' gas is lighted fr'm th' burner, an' got him so he wud not bump his head again' th' ceilin' ivry time th' beer pump threw a fit afther that we'd talk iv the pollytical situation."
D'ye think at my age I wud be contint to dash fr'm wan justice coort to another pleadin' f'r habyas-corpus writs or test me principles iv personal expansion in a Noo Jarsey village? he says. 'I'd rather be a dead prisidint thin a live ex-prisidint. If I have anny pollytical ambition I'd rather be a Grant or a Garfield thin a Cleveland or a Harrison, he says.
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