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Updated: June 10, 2025
'I will, says the king; 'and as you are the first man I ever heer'd tell of that rode a dhraggin, you shall be called Lord Mount Dhraggin, says he. 'And where's my estates, plaze your holiness? says the waiver, who always had a sharp look-out afther the main chance.
Sleepless an' vigilant, he stood beside th' suffrin' mules, allayin' their pain, an' slowly but surely dhraggin' thim out iv th' clutches iv pinkeye an' epizootic. He had a cheery wurrud, a pleasant smile, an' a bottle iv liniment f'r wan an' all. He cured Teddy Rosenfelt's hor-rse iv intherference an' made a soothin' lotion iv axle-grease f'r Gin'ral Shafter's buckboard.
'It is throwin' away my time I have been all my life, says he; 'livin' with you at all, and stuck at a loom, nothin' but a poor waiver, when it is Saint George or the Dhraggin I ought to be, which is two of the siven champions o' Christendom. 'Well, suppose they christened him twice as much, says the wife; 'sure, what's that to uz?
Well, there was great rejoicin' in the coort that the dhraggin was killed; and says the king to the little waiver, says he, 'You are a knight arriant as it is, and so it would be of no use for to knight you over agin; but I will make you a lord, says he. 'O Lord! says the waiver, thunder-struck like at his own good luck.
"I'm an ould fool," said Mulvaney, reflectively, "dhraggin' you two out here bekaze I was undher the Black Dog sulkin' like a child. Me that was soldierin' when Mullins, an' be damned to him, was shquealin' on a counterpin for five shillin' a week an' that not paid! Bhoys, I've took you five miles out av natural pervarsity. Phew!"
'Divil a fut I'll go down, says the waiver. Well, as soon as the waiver knew he was dead asleep, by the snorin' of him and every snore he let out of him was like a clap o' thunder that minit the waiver began to creep down the three, as cautious as a fox; and he was very nigh hand the bottom, when, bad cess to it, a thievin' branch he was dipindin' an bruk, and down he fell right a-top o' the dhraggin; but if he did, good luck was an his side, for where should he fall but with his two legs right acrass the dhraggin's neck, and, my jew'l, he laid howlt o' the baste's ears, and there he kept his grip, for the dhraggin wakened and endayvoured for to bite him; but, you see, by rayson the waiver was behind his ears, he could not come at him, and, with that, he endayvoured for to shake him off; but the divil a stir could he stir the waiver; and though he shuk all the scales an his body, he could not turn the scale agin the waiver.
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