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Updated: May 9, 2025
That shall be try'd; go to the Place where Charles has directed you, and do as I command you. Servants. Oh, sweet Diana, in whom I had plac'd my absolute Delight, And gave thee to this Villain, because I wish'd thee happy. And are my Expectations fall'n to this? Upon his Wedding Night to abandon thee, And shew his long dissembled natural Leudness! Char.
I'd have you to know I merit her: And as for Leudness, I name no body, Bellmour but only some have the Art of hiding it better than I but for Whoring, Drinking, Dicing, and all the deadly Sins that thereupon depend, I thank my Stars, I come short of you: And since you say, I shall not have your Sister, by Fortune, I will have your Sister, and love your Sister, and lie with your Sister, inspite of you.
I whore, drink, game, swear, lye, cheat, rob, pimp, hector, all, all I do that's vitious. Sir Tim. Bless me! Bel. From such a Villian, hah! Sir Tim. No, but that thou should'st hide it all this while. Bel. Till I was married only, and now I can dissemble it no longer come let's to a Baudy-House. Sir Tim. A Baudy-house! What, already! This is the very quintessence of Leudness.
This is the Trade you drive, you eternal Fop, when I sit at home expecting you Night after Night. Sir Tim. Nay, dear Betty! Flaunt. 'Tis here you spend that which shou'd buy me Points and Petticoats, whilst I go like no body's Mistress; I'd as live be your Wife at this rate, so I had: and I'm in no small danger of getting the foul Disease by your Leudness. Sir Tim.
This thou art so sorry a Creature, thou wilt endure any thing for the lucre of her Fortune; 'tis that thou hast a Passion for: not that thou carest for Money, but to sacrifice to thy Leudness, to purchase a Mistress, to purchase the Reputation of as errant a Fool as ever arriv'd at the Honour of keeping; to purchase a little Grandeur, as you call it; that is, to make every one look at thee, and consider what a Fool thou art, who else might pass unregarded amongst the common Croud.
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