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Updated: June 3, 2025
Your Honner nathaless praises my invenshon every now-and-then: Alas! and plese your Honner, what invenshon should such a plane man as I have? But when your Honner sets me agoing by your fine invenshon, I can do well enuff. And I am sure I have a hearty good will to deserve your Honner's faver, if I mought. Two days, as I may say, off and on, have I been writing this long letter.
For, althoff I think myself verry honnest, and all that, yet I am touched a littel, for fear I should not do the quite right thing: and too besides, your Honner has such a fesseshious way with you, as that I hardly know whether you are in jest or earnest, when your Honner calls me honnest so often.
I thote as how it was best to acquent you Honner of this; and for you to let me kno' if I could do any think to sarve your Honner, and prevent mischief with my cuzzen Titus, on his coming back from Nottingam, before he mackes his reporte.
And this, and some other matters, of verry bad reporte, 'Squier Solmes was to tell my young lady of, if so be she would have harde him speke, before we lost her sweet company, as I may say, from heere.* * See Vol.II. Letters XV. and XVI. Your Honner helped me to many ugly stories to tell against you Honner to my younge master, and younge mistriss; but did not tell me about this.
"Oh! the Cap'n manes the skilleton, maybe," said Chane. "What skeleton?" I demanded. "Why, an owld skilleton the boys found in the chaparril, yer honner. They hung it to a three; and we found yer honner there, with the skilleton swinging over ye like a sign. Och! the Frinch bastes!" I made no further inquiries about the "Death." "But where are the Frenchmen?" asked I, after a moment.
The magistrate, who knew the old wag, said, 'Michael Cahill, you speak English very well, to which the old man replied, ''Tis not for the likes o' me to conthradict yer honner, but divil resave the word iv it I ondhersthand at all, at all. There was a great roar from the Court, and the interpreter was trotted forward.
Last week my younge master sed before my fase, My harte's blood boils over, Capten Singleton, for revenge upon this and he called your Honner by a name it is not for such a won as me to say what. Capten Singleton whispred my younge master, being I was by.
But here my conscience smites me, that, but for some of my stories, which your Honner taute me, my old master, and my old lady, and the two old 'squires, would not have been able to be half so hardhearted as they be, for all my younge master and younge mistress sayes.
But why shoulde it? when all I do is to prevent mischeff; and seeing your Honner has so much patience, which younge master has not; so am not affeard of telling your Honner any thing whatsomever.
And, I hope, your Honner will not think me a dishonest man for sarving your Honner agenst my duty, as it may look; but only as my conshence clears me. Be pleased, howsomever, if it like your Honner, not to call me honest Joseph, so often.
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