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Updated: June 22, 2025
'I beg ye'er pardon, he says. "'Beg th' pardon iv Hiven, says I, 'f'r stoppin' a desperate man in th' sthreet, says I; 'f'r in a holy minyit I'll blow off th' head iv ye, says I, with me hand on th' handkerchief that niver blew nawthin' but this nose iv mine." "'I humbly ask your pardon, he says, showin' a star; 'but I'm a polisman. "'Polisman or robber, says I, 'stand aside! I says.
Brian, "it does one's heart good to see a bit of luck like that happenin' to a body." "Ay, does it," said Judy Ryan, "the crathur to be gettin' back her sight just in the right minyit of time to see her son comin' home to her. Sure now one might take a plisure in plannin' such a thing, if one had the managin' of them."
Another Vanderbilt weddin'. That sounds like goluf, but it ain't. Newport society livin' in Mrs. Potther Pammer's cellar. Green-goods men declare f'r honest money. Anson in foorth place some more. Pianny tuners f'r McKinley. Li Hung Chang smells a rat. Abner McKinley supports th' goold standard. Wait a minyit. Here it is: 'Goluf in gay attire. Let me see. H'm. 'Foozled his aproach, nasty thing.
They have guns that anny boy or girl who knows th' typewriter can wurruk, an' they have other guns on th' music box plan, that ye wind up an' go away an' lave, an' they annoy anny wan that comes along. They have guns that bounces up out iv a hole in th' groun', fires a millyon shells a minyit an' dhrops back f'r another load.
No polisman in sight. A man's down with twinty on top iv him wan minyit. Th' next he's settin' on th' pile usin' a base-ball bat on th' neighbor next below him. 'Come on, boys, f'r 'tis growin' late, an' no wan's been kilt yet. Glory be, but this is th' life! "Now, if I'm tired I don't want to fight. A man bats me in th' eye an' I call f'r th' polis. They isn't a polisman in sight.
"Him an' me sat a long time smokin' across th' stove. Fin'lly, says I, 'Well, I says, 'I must be movin'. 'What's th' hurry? says he. 'I've got to go, says I. 'Wait a moment, says he. 'Theresa 'll' He stopped right there f'r a minyit, holdin' to th' back iv th' chair. 'Well, says he, 'if ye've got to go, ye must, he says. 'I'll show ye out, he says.
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