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An', as if that was not delay enough, who should come in to stop for the night but Father O'Flaherty, of Cahirmore, that was buyin' a horse at the fair! An' av course, there was a bed to be med down for his raverence, an' some other attintions; an' a long discoorse himself an' ould Mrs.
Dooley, "I thought it was McKinley an' Hobart that won out, but I see now that it's McKinley an' Prosperity. If Bryan had been elected, Humanity would have had a front seat an' a tab. Th' sufferin's iv all th' wurruld would have ended; an' Jawn H. Humanity would be in th' White House, throwin' his feet over th' furniture an' receivin' th' attintions iv diplomats an' pleeniapotentiaries.
'We're all profissors iv colledges or lawyers whin we're home, he says. 'Is it war to shoot my aunt? says th' dillygate fr'm Chiny. Cries iv 'No, no. 'Is it war to hook me father's best hat that he left behind whin he bashfully hurrid away to escape th' attintions iv Europeen sojery? he says. 'Is robbery war? says he. 'Robbery is a nicissry part iv war, says th' English dillygate.
Just as ye'er wife is thinkin' iv ye bein' wrecked on a desert island or floatin' on a raft an' signallin' with an undershirt she picks up th' pa-aper an' reads: 'Th' life iv th' ship is Malachi Hinnissy, a wealthy bachelor fr'm Pittsburg. His attintions to a widow from Omaha are most marked. They make a handsome couple. "Well, sir, they must 've had th' gloryus time on boord this new boat.
An', you phanix of beauty, you managed the childhre, the crathurs, the same way an' a good way it is, in throth." "Pether, wor you ever thinkin' o' Father Muloahy's sweetness to us of late?" "No, thin, the sorra one o' me thought of it. Why, Ellish?" "Didn't you obsarve that for the last three or four months he's full of attintions to us?
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