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Was that Sir Francis? that blood-smeared, mangled creature? that the lascivious dandy, the disciple of no-creed and self-worship? Errington shuddered and averted his gaze from that hideous face, so horribly contorted, yet otherwise deathlike in its rigid stillness. There was a grave hush.
But Madame de Vallorbes remained dissatisfied. The day had been one of uncertainty, of conflicting emotions, and Helen's love of unqualified purposes was great. Confusion in others was highly diverting. But in herself no thank you! She hated it. It touched her self-confidence. It endangered the absoluteness of her self-belief and self-worship.
We can pray to a Deity conceived as solely transcendent, but not to a Deity conceived as solely immanent, i.e., as the Sum of Being. A vague "cosmic emotion" differs toto coelo from worship; we cannot worship that which includes us, for if we did we should be indulging in self-worship, and as for prayer, we could no more seriously offer it to the universe than to the atmosphere.
And if God must help ere a man can be saved, can the help of man go too far towards the same end? Let God solve the mystery for he made it. One thing is sure: We are his, and he will do his part, which is no part but the all in all. If man could do what in his wildest self-worship he can imagine, the grand result would be that he would be his own God, which is the Hell of Hells.
I am beginning to doubt whether my belief on the matter has not been the product of insular ignorance and idolatrous self-worship. It may be that a peach should be a combination of an apple and a turnip. "My great objection to your country, sir," said another, "is that you have got no vegetables." Had he told me that we had got no sea-board, or no coals, he would not have surprised me more.
The point to make is that anyone, high or low, rich or poor, learned or unlettered, although to all appearances he may be a jewel among men, and the fine flower of all that is best—if he gives utterance to some pronouncement or speaks some word from which can be detected the scent of self-worship, or a malicious and evil purpose, his aim is to disintegrate the Word of God and disperse the gathering of the people of Bahá.
Men only speak so after great and wonderful travail, and by that token I knew Narcissus loved at last. It had seemed unlikely ground from which love had first sprung forth, that of a self-worship that could forgo no slightest indulgence but thence indeed it had come.
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