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Updated: May 7, 2025
Hansombody to deny that our town was deteriorating the rising generation more mischievous than its parents, and given to mitching from school, and cigarette smoking, if not to worse. Now this was a really damaging attack, for Mr. Hansombody not only presides over our School Board, but has a son in the tobacco business. He met it magnificently.
They showed the average school attendance in Cornwall to be lower than in any county of England or Wales. But" and Mr. Hansombody raised his forefinger "the same statistician in the very same paper proves the average of criminal prosecutions in Cornwall to be the lowest in England and Wales." "And you infer " I began as he paused triumphantly. "I infer nothing, sir.
Hansombody took a fresh stand on the superiority of the old broad-gauge carriages; and this, since it raised no personal question, we discussed in very good humour while we unpacked and ate our luncheons. In the midst of our meal a lady at the far end of the compartment heaved a sigh and ejaculated "Poor thing!" which at once set us off discussing the case anew.
Hansombody agreed with me in a whisper that under similar circumstances he or I could have made a better fight for it. The fellow had shown no sport. We blushed for our town. But Troy has a knack of winning its races on the post. Judgment, as the phrase goes, was on the point of being entered accordingly, when the defendant looked up towards the Bench with a sudden, happy smile.
A form being handy, we could, as an alternative, have hung Patient No. 1 over it, head downwards." But at this point, unfortunately, the humour of the situation became too much for Miss Gertrude Hansombody, another of the students. She began to titter, went on to laugh uncontrollably, then to clench her hands and sob. "Subject: Hysterics!" called the lecturer.
The journey to Bodmin is not a long one as the crow flies, but, as our carpenter, Mr. Hansombody, put it, "we are not crows, and, that being the case, naturally resent being packed sixteen in a compartment." Mr. Hansombody taxed the Great Western Company with lack of foresight in not running excursion trains, and appealed to me to support his complaint. Driven from this position, Mr.
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