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Updated: June 20, 2025
Wen de flood come, an' all de yearth wuz drownded, didn' he paddle de ark till he landed her on top de mount er rats? 'Dey young men shall die by de s'ord, an' dey sons an' dey daughters by de famine. "Oh, you chu'ch membahs wat shouts an' prays uv er Sundays an' steals watermillions uv er week-days! Oh, you young men wat's er cussin' an' er robbin' uv henrooses!
Eby night de Lord sen' dar's dancin' an' loffin' an' fiddlin'; an' efn er man raises 'im er few chickens an' watermillions, dey ain't safe no longer'n his back's turnt; an', let erlone dat, dar's quarlin' 'longer one nudder, an' dar's sassin' uv white folks an' ole pussuns, an' dar's drinkin' uv whiskey, an' dar's beatin' uv wives, an' dar's dev'lin' uv husban's, an' dar's imperrence uv chil'en, an' dar's makin' fun uv 'ligion, an' dar's singin' uv reel chunes, an' dar's slightin' uv wuck, an' dar's stayin' fum meetin', an' dar's swearin' an' cussin', an' dar's eby kin' er wickedness an' dev'lment loose in de land.
"Yes, Peter, and the robins we used to shoot and the rabbits we used to trap?" "An' dem watermillions, suh um-m-m, um-m-m-m!" "Y-e-s," returned the colonel, with a shade of pensiveness. There had been two sides to the watermelon question.
He sole sum ob de seed, an' frum dem seed farmers rose de biggest watermillions ob eny in dis kintry." "Dat will do pretty well for you; drive the boat along." "Dus yu think dat I tole yu a story, Boss?" "Oh, no; I only thought that one of your 'Jack-mer-lanterns' had been after you, or that somebody had been throwing a 'ball of fire' at your head."
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