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"Though, of course, I never looked for any such developments as this. I was merely trying to act on Colonel Cowles's advice about always playing up local topics. You are doubtless familiar with his dictum that the people are far more interested in a cat-fight at Seventh and Centre Streets than in the greatest exploits of science." West laughed and rose to go.
"I had been sleeping like the dead a perfectly dreamless sleep till Mary woke us up with her cat-fight. That aroused me so thoroughly that I didn't go to sleep again for more than an hour. Then when I did drop off at nearly morning, I dreamed that there was a spider on my head, and I gave it a tremendous whack to kill it.
"But always remember this: the great People are more interested in a cat-fight at the corner of Seventh and Centre Streets than they are in the greatest exploit of the greatest scientific theorist that ever lived." "I will remember what you say, Colonel." "I want you," resumed Colonel Cowles, "to take supper with me at the club. Not to-night I'm engaged. Shall we say to-morrow night, at seven?"
If there was a horse-race, you'd find him flush or you'd find him busted at the end of it; if there was a dog-fight, he'd bet on it; if there was a cat-fight, he'd bet on it; if there was a chicken-fight, he'd bet on it; why, if there was two birds setting on a fence, he would bet you which one would fly first; or if there was a camp-meeting, he would be there reg'lar to bet on Parson Walker, which he judged to be the best exhorter about here, and so he was too, and a good man.
You have helped him to store up some very pleasant memories of this happy Valley." "Good-by, little Vicar," said Phil next, seizing both her hands. "Think of the Best Man whenever you look at the Philip on your shilling, and think of his parting words. Do profit by that dreadful dream, and don't take any rash steps that would lead to another cat-fight.
If there was a horse-race, you'd find him flush or you'd find him busted at the end of it; if there was a dogfight, he'd bet on it; if there was a cat-fight, he'd bet on it; if there was a chicken-fight, he'd bet on it; why, if there was two birds setting on a fence, he would bet you which one would fly first; or if there was a camp-meeting, he would be there reg'lar to bet on Parson Walker, which he judged to be the best exhorter about here, and so he was, too, and a good man.
"'Haddsy, old horse, I says, 'we've only got one show. If we can create a diversion we win. My head's that rumpled, the only thing strikes me is for us to go out there and play cat-fight. Holler, and meaowl, and spit, and screech, and jump around till she can't help but look at us. That's the way I uset to amuse the twins when they needed killin'; of course we'll look like a pair of fools
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