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Ordher thim to th' goluf links at wanst. They must be no indecision. Where's Richard Harding Davis? On th' bridge iv the New York? Tur-rn th' bridge. Seize Gin'ral Miles' uniform. We must strengthen th' gold resarve. Where's th' Gussie? Runnin' off to Cuba with wan hundherd men an' ar-rms, iv coorse. Oh, war is a dhreadful thing. It's ye'er move, Claude, says th' Sthrateejy Board.
What we need, Hinnissy, is a perfect undherstandin' between th' ar-rmy an' th' administhration. We need what Hogan calls th' esphrite th' corpse, an' we'll on'y have it whin th' mules begins to move." "I shud think," said Mr. Hennessy, "now that th' jackasses has begun to be onaisy" "We ought to be afraid th' cabinet an' th' Boord iv Sthrateejy 'll be stampeded?" Mr. Dooley interrupted.
An' fr'm all cor-rners iv th' counthry they've gone to Washin'ton, where they're called th' Sthrateejy Board. "Day an' night they set in a room with a checker-board on th' end iv a flour bar'l, an' study problems iv th' navy. At night Mack dhrops in. 'Well, boys, says he, 'how goes th' battle? he says. 'Gloryous, says th' Sthrateejy Board.
"Cousin George is a good man, an' I'm very fond iv him, more be raison iv his doin' that May-o bosthoon Pat Mountjoy, but he has low tastes. We niver cud make a sthrateejan iv him. They'se a kind iv a vulgar fightin' sthrain in him that makes him want to go out an' slug some wan wanst a month. I'm glad he ain't in Washin'ton. Th' chances ar-re he'd go to th' Sthrateejy Board and pull its hair."
If ye say, lave go, I dhrop thim. 'Twas George won thim with th' shells, an' th' question's up to him." "It looks to me," said Mr. Dooley, "as though me frind Mack'd got tired iv th' Sthrateejy Board, an' was goin' to lave th' war to th' men in black." "How's that?" asked Mr. Hennessy, who has at best but a clouded view of public affairs. "Well," said Mr.
'Two more moves, an' we'll be in th' king row. 'Ah, says Mack, 'this is too good to be thrue, he says. 'In but a few brief minyits th' dhrinks'll be on Spain, he says. 'Have ye anny plans f'r Sampson's fleet? he says. 'Where is it? says th' Sthrateejy Board. 'I dinnaw, says Mack. 'Good, says th' Sthrateejy Board. 'Where's th' Spanish fleet? says they.
'Bombardin' Boston, at Cadiz, in San June de Matzoon, sighted near th' gas-house be our special correspondint, copyright, 1898, be Mike O'Toole. 'A sthrong position, says th' Sthrateejy Board. 'Undoubtedly, th' fleet is headed south to attack and seize Armour's glue facthory. Ordher Sampson to sail north as fast as he can, an' lay in a supply iv ice. Th' summer's comin' on.
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