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You have to get into that. By the way, your balls are floaters, I hope?" "Only six of 'em," I said. "However, I dare say you won't mind if I grub up a few potatoes to carry on with afterwards. So we hole out in the water-butt? That's the tiddleywinks part of it, I suppose? Go on." "There are various penalties," he explained.
Secondly, it must be a game into which skill does not enter, or, if it does, it must be a skill which is as likely to be shown by a child of eight or an old gentleman of eighty as by a 'Varsity blue. Such skill, for instance, as manifests itself at Tiddleywinks, that noble game. Yet, even so, Tiddleywinks is too skilful a pursuit.
"The game," he said, "is a mixture of the old golf, tiddleywinks, ludo and the race game." "Not spillikins?" I protested. "A game I rather fancy myself at." "For your information, please," continued James in his kindliest military manner, "I may remark that a mashie is the club mostly used except when it is necessary to keep low between, say, two clumps of potatoes."
Grotesque and foolish as this will seem to the sober reader, it is absolutely true. Strange mind of man! that, with our species being mashed all around, we could sit following the chance of this painted pasteboard. Afterwards we tried "Tiddleywinks" and "Squails," and I beat him so persistently that both sides of the House were mine and my geniality entirely returned.
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