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Updated: May 10, 2025
I am a good Turk, and I fought beside the English in Kordofan and learned their tongue. I live only to see the ruin of Enver, who has beggared my family and slain my twin brother. Therefore I serve the Muscov ghiaours. 'I don't know what the Musky jaws are, but if you mean the Russians I'm with you. I've got news for them which will make Enver green.
During this interesting comedy the "audience" are fairly shaking in their rags with suppressed merriment; and when the taciturn individual himself who has thus far retained his habitual self-composure growing restive under the hateful imputation of being a Muscov and my supposed bellicose sentiments toward him in consequence, finally repudiates the part thus summarily assigned him, the whole company bursts out into a boisterous roar of laughter.
He carried on his parable in Turkish: 'Muscov dormous, and illustrated his meaning by drawing his thumb with Masonic vigour across his windpipe. The words and the action together were meant to signify that the Russian was a hog and ought to have his throat cut Straightway up stood a little Greek with a 'Je suis Muscov, monsieur, and the captain promptly knocked him down.
For they, too, believed in the life beyond the tomb, wherein there should be no fana Muscov to infest the mountains of happiness, and where the warrior, laying aside his rifle and his bow, should hear no more of war beyond the home-march at beat of which he would enter within the gates of paradise.
I show them my Turkish teskeri, upon which several of them bestow fervent kisses, and when, by means of placing several stones here and there I explained to them how in 1877, the hated Muscov occupied different Mussulman cities one after the other, and was prevented by the English from occupying their dearly beloved Stamboul itself, their admiration knows no bounds.
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