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I know thay do, becawz I never saw a man whoos didn't. Respectively yures, A. Ward. P.S. You scratch my back & Ile scratch your back. Every man has got a Fort. It's sum men's fort to do one thing, and some other men's fort to do another, while there is numeris shiftliss critters goin round loose whose fort is not to do nothin.

Hirum Doolittle, who kindly furnisht sum cold vittles at a tryin time, when it wasunt konvenient to cook vittles at my hous; & the Peasleys, Parsunses & Watsunses fur there meny ax of kindness. Trooly yures, Artemus Ward. Dear Betsy: I write you this from Boston, "the Modern Atkins," as it is denomyunated, altho' I skurcely know what those air. I'll giv you a kursoory view of this city.

He don't do nobody no good & is a cuss to society & a pirit on honest peple's corn beef barrils. Admittin all you say abowt the doctrin to be troo, I must say the reglar perfessional Sperrit rappers them as makes a biznis on it air abowt the most ornery set of cusses I ever enkountered in my life. So sayin I put on my surtoot and went home. Respectably Yures, Artemus Ward.

Or finally, this, which has the perfect tone of the great French moralists: "It iz a verry delicate job to forgive a man without lowering him in his own estimashun, and yures too." See how the moralistic note is struck in the field of political satire. It is 1866, and "Petroleum V. Nasby," writing from "Confedrit X Roads," Kentucky, gives Deekin Pogram's views on education.

At sum futur time I shall continner my remarks on the drammer in which I shall show the varst supeeriority of wax figgers and snakes over theater plays, in a interlectooal pint of view. Very Respectively yures, A WARD, T.K. Some years ago I pitched my tent and onfurled my banner to the breeze, in Berlin Hites, Ohio.