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I have heard that some who are in my army feel scruples about remaining in my service unless I embrace the Catholic religon. No doubt they think me weak enough for them to imagine that they can force me thereby to abjure my religion and break my word.
"I would give ten dollars to know how a pint of red ants got into my liver pad. Religon is one thing, and a million ants walking all over a man, playing tag, is another. I didn't know the liver pad was loaded. How in Gehenna did they get in there?" and Pa scowled at Ma as though he would kill her. "'Don't swear dear," says Ma, as she threw down her hymn book, and took off her bonnet.
He said I had no more conception of the beauties of scripture than a mule, and then I told Pa he couldn't expect a mule to know much unless the mule's father had brought him up right, and where a mule's father had been a regular old bummer till he got jim-jams, and only got religon to keep out of the inebriate asylum, that the little mule was entitled to more charity for his short comings than the mule's Papa.
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