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Updated: May 3, 2025
Mr Ward statid that he would not give a fillosoffical lectoor nor an astronomical lectoor nor did he say what kind of lectoor he would give. The subjec was, however, the "Babes in the Wood." He has had the Babes in the Wood sum time. Mr. Ward is not rich but is doin as well as could be expected. It is one of the lectoors you read about, you know here.
Yis, I sa it's a great moril lectoor; I sa it boldly, because I've heerd of it. The structoor of the lectoor was as they sa in architectoor of the compost like ordoor; first a stratter of this, then a stratter of that; that is to sa kinder mixed, you know.
The papers, with thare usuil fidelity to fax, had stated that the entertainment would consist only of a lectoor, & that the kangaroo & wax-figgers would not be introdooced "dooced queer," thinks I, and I soon discovered the telegram; for Mr. Ward used a number of figgers of speech.
It seemed as tho the hole populashun had turned out en massy to welcum the gratist wit of his age. He is older than me. The curtin roze no, I do not desire to misrepresent fax there was no curtin I think thare should have bin! The lectoor commenced at a few minutes past ate precisely.
Some of the funniest of the fundymentall principles of the lectoor escaped me rather I escaped them partly owin to the fokes squeeging in at the dore, and partly owin to a pretty but frail gurl wayin all the way from 200 up to 250 lbs. avoirdoopois, which sot herself rite onto my lap.
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