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"What upon airth ales the man?" sez Taberthy Ripley. "Sakes alive, what air you doin?" & she grabd me by the coat tales. "What's the matter with you?" she continnerd. "Twins, marm," sez I, "twins!" "I know it," sez she, coverin her pretty face with her apun. "Wall," sez I, "that's what's the matter with me!" "Wall, put down that air gun, you pesky old fool," sed she.
"Yes," I anserd, "you hav found me at larst, and you would hav found me at fust, if you had cum sooner." She grabd me vilently by the coat collar, and brandishin her umbreller wildly round, exclaimed: "Air you a man?" Sez I, "I think I air, but if you doubt it, you can address Mrs. A. Ward, Baldinsville, Injianny, postage pade, & she will probly giv you the desired informashun."
"I do," sed he; sayin which he walked up to the cage and sez he, "let's try moral swashun upon the poor creeter." So he put his hand upon the Kangeroo's hed and sed, "poor little fellow poor little fellow your master is very crooil, isn't he, my untootered frend," when the Kangaroo, with a terrific yell, grabd the Perfesser by the hand and cum very near chawin it orf.
I cawt a glimpse of him as he sot on the Pizarro of the hotel in Sarnia, & elbowd myself threw a crowd of wimin, children, sojers & Injins that was hangin round the tavern. I was drawin near to the Prince when a red-faced man in Millingtery close grabd holt of me and axed me whare I was goin all so bold? "To see Albert Edard the Prince of Wales," sez I; "who are you?"
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