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Updated: November 28, 2025
"Yes," I anserd, "you hav found me at larst, and you would hav found me at fust, if you had cum sooner." She grabd me vilently by the coat collar, and brandishin her umbreller wildly round, exclaimed: "Air you a man?" Sez I, "I think I air, but if you doubt it, you can address Mrs. A. Ward, Baldinsville, Injianny, postage pade, & she will probly giv you the desired informashun."
But, serisly, I concluded to stop exhibitin', and made tracks for Baldinsville. My only daughter threw herself onto my boosum, and said, "It is me fayther! I thank the gods!" She reads the "Ledger." "Tip us yer bunch of fives, old faker!" said ARTEMUS, Jr. He reads the "Clipper." My wife was to the sowin' circle. I allus like to see people enjoy theirselves.
Monk has been in the lord bisniss some time, and I understand it pays, tho' I don't know what a lord's wages is. The wages of sin is death and postage stamps. But this has nothing to do with MONK. One of Lord MONK'S daughters rode with him on the field. She has golden hair, a kind, good face, and wore a red hat. I should be very happy to have her pay me and my family a visit at Baldinsville.
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