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'If all th' la-ads enthered into th' r- races with th' same spirit ye show now, I says, 'th' English flag'd be dhroopin' fr'm th' staff, an' Cyrus Bodley iv Wadham, Mass.,'d be paintin' th' stars an' sthripes on th' Nelson monnymint, I says. 'Whin we hated th' English, I says, 'an' a yacht r-race was li'ble to end in a war message fr'm the prisidint, we used to bate thim, I says.
"Whin we hove them mules over the side, I noticed one as was coollured most peculiar, all sthripes ov black on a white skin, jist like one ov them zaybrays they haves in the sarcus show, an' they're called so, by the same token, 'case they brays like a donkey and comes over the zay, you see?"
"For twinty years and more did I folly the flag in all lands and in all climates, wid wounds all over me body, an' medals an' good conduct sthripes an' an' all that; an' now, wid niver a word av complaint or explanashun, to be turned aff like a dog an' worse."
"'What we want to do f'r our sojer boys in th' Ph'lipeens besides killin' thim, says th' ar-rmy surgeon, 'is make th' place more homelike, he says. 'Manny iv our heroes hasn't had th' deleeryum thremens since we first planted th' stars an' sthripes, he says, 'an' th' bay'nits among th' people, he says.
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