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Updated: May 27, 2025
Is she handsom? Fran. Oh, what an Ague shakes my Heart, handsom! alas, no, dread Sir; what shou'd such a deform'd Polecat as I do with a handsom Wife? Car. Is she young? Fran. Young, what shou'd such an old doting Coxcomb as I do with a young Wife? Pox on him for a Heathen Whoremaster. Car. Old is she then? Fran. Ay, very old, an't please your Gloriousness. Car. Is she not capable of Love? Fran.
'curtailed thus of fair proportion, Cheated of feature by dissembling nature, Deform'd, unfinished, sent before their time Into this breathing world, scarce half made up, And that so lamely and unfashionable, That dogs bark at them. Through these misfortunes they hope to tell upon the feelings of the public, and thereby secure a larger share of patronage.
"I that am curtail'd of this fair proportion, Cheated of feature, by dissembling Nature, Deform'd, unfinish'd, sent before my time, Into the breathing world, scarce half made up; And that so lamely and unfashionably, That dogs bark at me, as I halt by them."
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