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Updated: May 3, 2025
In this state of doubting, I was ready to wish myself at home, from an apprehension that I should only expose myself to reproach, and wound the cause I was embark'd in; for the heavens seem'd like brass, and the earth as iron; such coldness and hardness, I thought, could scarcely have ever been experienc'd before by any creature, so great was the depth of my baptism at this time; nevertheless, as I endeavor'd to quiet my mind, in this conflicting dispensation, and be resign'd to my allotment, however distressing, towards the latter part of the meeting a ray of light broke through the surrounding darkness, in which the Shepherd of Israel was pleas'd to arise, and by the light of his glorious countenance, to scatter those clouds of opposition.
Let me get to Paris, Monsieur le Count, said I, and I shall do very well. So I embark'd, and never thought more of the matter.
I return'd him many Thanks for his Humanity, but told him I durst not attribute to my self the Character he gave me; that I was a Lover of Truth, and would not, on any Account, disguise the real Motive which sent me on an Undertaking I look'd upon impossible to go thro' with, and which I very unwillingly embark'd in: But since, contrary to my Expectations, Providence has guided me to this Terrestrial Paradice, I should esteem my self extreamly happy, if I might be permitted to ask such Questions as my Curiosity might prompt me to.
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