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Updated: June 18, 2025


"Will I say it now? No, you plockit, no; and I will write your mother word you have proke Priscian's head four times this tay, since her letter came. You Irish plockit!" continued the relentless grammarian, "will you never learn the tifference between shall and will? Will I hear the letter, and will I see her once more? What Enclish is this, plockit?"

There is no rule without its exception, and it may be urged that the works of the gentlemen and ladies who "break Priscian's head" as they would say themselves may be successful, but are not literature. Now it is about literature that we are speaking. In the matter of style, there is another excellent way. You need not neglect it, but you may study it wrongly.

But they are bound to speak decent English, unless, indeed, they are rough old campaigners, like General Jackson or General Taylor; in which case, a few scars on Priscian's head are pardoned to old fellows who have quite as many on their own, and a constituency of thirty empires is not at all particular, provided they do not swear in their Presidential Messages. However, it is not for me to talk.

It was a consolation to him, while his adversaries were breaking Priscian's head as fast as the Duke, their master, was breaking his oaths, that his own syntax was as clear as his conscience. The feeblest commissioner was James-a-Croft, who had already exhibited himself with very anile characteristics, and whose subsequent manifestations were to seem like dotage.

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