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She says I'll make quite a good maid after a bit!" "Well, I hope to the Lord you will!" said Mrs. Spruce with a sniffy "For it's a chance in a 'undred, comin' straight out of the village to a first situation with, a lady like Miss Vancourt. And I 'ope you'll profit by it!
"She was the most beautiful gal I ever saw in my life; she 'ad one 'undred pounds a year of 'er own and she couldn't bear me out of her sight. If a thump acrost the chest would do that cough of yours any good, Sam " "Don't take no notice of 'im, Ginger," ses Peter. "Why didn't you marry 'er?"
Then another paper dug up from somewhere a sort of animated corpse that said was a 'undred and two, and attributed the unfortunate fact to 'is always 'aving 'ad 'is food as 'ot as 'e could swallow it. A bit of sense did begin to dawn upon 'im then, but too late in the day, I take it. 'E'd played about with 'imself too long.
"No, sir; I can't do that, because, you see, I'm thinking about you. Here's 'undred and eighty-odd pound of a poor man's hard-earned money, most part of which you owe me." "It is false! I don't owe you a penny." The tailor shook his head. "I can't afford to lose it, Sir Richard; and you can't say but what I want to make it easy for you with them bills."
Sam laughed the sort of laugh a pal 'ad once give him a black eye for. "Twenty pounds!" he ses; "twenty pounds! 'Ave you gorn out of your mind, or wot? I'll give you a couple of quid for it." "Well, it's all right, captin," ses the man, "there's no 'arm done. I'll try somebody else or p'r'aps there'll be a big reward for it. I don't believe it was bought for a 'undred pounds."
'E tries to work a werry wiry dodge on the johnny-raws, bout bein' ha 'undred hand ten years hold. Says 'e's got some kind o' water wot kips hun' from growink hold, My heye! strikes me if 'e 'ad, 'e wouldn't bein' sellin' soap 'bout 'ere. Go hup to 'im hand tell 'im to move hon, 'e's ben wurkin this lay long enough, I ham thinkin'.
The U.P. gets busy; in an 'undred papers there begins to appear what the U.P. calls Public Opinion, that's to say the opinion of the people that agree with the U.P. There you 'ave it, sir, only them and it appears strong.
Do you suppose, gentlemen, I would bring you here to sell you a salted mine? You can ask anybody back in the city if my credit isn't first-class." "Oh, mon," said a tall Highlander, "oh, mon, the feller's crazy. Salted humph! We saw the gold with our own eyes. I say take the mine. I'll take a thousand shares at a pound. How much is the deal, did the mon say?" "H'an 'undred thousand pounds.
"She's been stinting me for twenty-nine years and saving the money my money! money that I 'ave earned with the sweat of my brow. She 'as got over three 'undred pounds!" "'Ow much?" demanded Mr. Chase. "Three 'undred pounds and more," repeated the other; "and if she had 'ad the sense to put it in a bank it would ha' been over four 'undred by this time.
"I 'ave only to add," he resumed, "that this 'ero is engaged exclusively by the management of the Palace Theatre of Varieties, at a figure previously undreamed of in the annals of the music-hall stage. He is in receipt of the magnificent weekly salary of no less than one thousand one 'undred and fifty pounds a week." Thunderous applause. "I 'ave little more to add.
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