United States or China ? Vote for the TOP Country of the Week !
A corryspondint iv th' Daily Saky, who wurruks in an old porcylain facthry in Maine, writes that this famous subjick iv th' Mickydoo, whose name has escaped him but who had a good job in a livery stable in Tokyo befure he was sint on a mission to th' American people to see what he cud get, wint into an all night resthrant an' demanded his threaty rights, which ar-re that th' waiter was to tuck his napkin into his collar an' th' bartinder must play "Nippon th' gloryous" on a mouth organ.
On'y wan iv them remained on th' field. He was lyin' face down, with his nose in th' mud. 'He's kilt, says I. 'I think he is, says Dorgan, with a merry smile. 'Twas my boy Jimmy done it, too, says he. 'He'll be arrested f'r murdher, says I. 'He will not, says he. 'There's on'y wan polisman in town cud take him, an' he's down town doin' th' same f'r somebody, he says.
"'Tis the pervarsity av the sect," sez I to mesilf, an' gave my cap another cock on my head an' straightened my back 'twas the back av a Dhrum Major in those days an' wint off as tho' I did not care, wid all the women in the Married Quarters laughin', I was pershuaded most bhoys are I'm thinkin' that no woman born av woman cud stand against me av I hild up my little finger.
Gin daylicht brook, Dauvid an' me had gotten the twa o' them akinda into order, and Sandy was able to open the shop. He had an awfu' ruggin' an' tuggin' afore he cud get the door to open; an' he cam' into me an' says, "Dod, Bawbie, I think the hoose has gotten a terriple thraw. The shop door 'ill nether go back nor forrit!" I gaed oot to see what was ado.
The sight of a cow placidly chewing her cud in a meadow, the patient creature standing knee-deep amid the buttercups, was a picture they all admired, Mollie carried a little camera, and insisted on snapping the bovine, though the other girls urged her to save some films with which to take their own pictures. "But that cow will make such a lovely enlargement," said Mollie.
Why I cud feed Bud on dynamite an' he'd take it all right if he cu'd eat it along with his biscuits. Onct I put concentrated lye in his coffee by mistake. I'd never knowed it if the pup hadn't got some of it by mistake an' rolled over an' died in agony. I rushed to the mill thinkin' Bud ud' be dead, sho' but he wa'nt. He never noticed it.
Bobby, carrying with him the bitterest possible cud of failure, retired within himself and gloomed angrily at the situation from all points of view. He was completely out of conceit with himself. After he had finished his performance, he naturally took to reviewing it and recasting it in terms of success. If he'd only shot at first, before he lost his breath!
'D'ye know that I can cross th' ocean in six days, an' won't; that if annything doesn't happen in Chiny I can larn about it in twinty-four hours if I care to know; that if ye was in Wash'nton I cud call ye up be tillyphone an ye'er wire'd be busy? I says. 'I do not, says Thomas Jefferson. 'Thin, says I, 'don't presume to advise me, I says, 'that knows these things an' manny more, I says.
In the morning I rise and crop the grass, then I come in to be milked. I go back to the meadow and bathe in the stream or eat as much grass as I want; in the afternoon I lie under the shade of the trees and chew the cud; and in the evening I come again to be milked, and once more return to the meadows. If I have a calf of my own, it is taken from me and sent I know not where.
Oh, she is a mortifying spectacle; she's always chewing the cud like an old ewe, "Ld. F. Then she's always ready to laugh, when Sneer offers to speak; and sits in expectation of his no jest, with her gums bare, and her mouth open "Brisk. Like an oyster at low ebb, egad ha, ha, ha! "Cynthia.
Word Of The Day