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Bill, I present to you a fellow-citizen of mine from grand old New York State." The frowsy man struggled up, shifted his revolver so as not to sit on it, and extended his hand. "Proud to make yore acquaintance, sir. Any friend of the Colonel's is a friend o' mine." "We will likker up directly," the Colonel informed. "But fust the gentleman desires to attend to his person. Mr.
Scott, in Mexico, said to Smith's brigade, "Brave rifles, you have been baptized in fire, and have come out steel." And Muggs, at Bluetown, after the last manoeuvre, said, "Feller sogers, that 'ere was prime and now less adjourn to the tavern and likker up at my expense." It is questionable whether any speech of Napoleon or Scott ever excited more enthusiasm.
"Be about as easy as drivin' a load o' hay back into the field, and fitting each spear o' grass back on the stalk from which it was cut," interjected Shorty. "Or I might send it anonymously to the Baptist Board o' Missions," continued the Deacon. "Nice way to treat the little heathens," objected Si. "Send them likker money." The Deacon groaned.
Seemed like it kind uv exalted an' purified Bill's nachur to git drunk an' git over it. Bill c'u'd drink more likker 'nd be sorrier for it than any other man in seven States. There never wuz a more penitent feller than he wuz when he wuz soberin'. The trubble with Bill seemed to be that his conscience didn't come on watch quite of'n enuff.
He's got better likker nor I hev an more on't, an he ain't a poor lone widder nuther, without noboddy ter stan up fer her," and the widow pointed her appeal by beginning to cry, which, as she was a buxom well-favored woman, made a decided impression on the crowd.
Three hundred fer a gallon o' likker! A ounce for a box o' pills! Eight hundred fer a barrel o' flour! Same fer pork, same fer sugar, same fer coffee! Damn yer picayune hides, we'll show ye what prices is! What's money to us? We can git the pure gold that money's made out of, an' git it all we want! Hooray fer Californy!" He broke into song.
"I hate to see you ruined by women and likker. Mule-skinnin' ain't all beer and skittles, as they say; but this job'll tide you over, anyhow, and you'll come out at the end with money in your pocket, if you choose, and no doctor's bill to pay." "Sir," I said gratefully, "may I think it over to-night, and let you know in the morning? Where will I find you?"
"Plenty folks b'lieved in charms, but I didn' take no stock in such truck. But I don't lak for de moon to shine on me when I's a-sleepin'. "De young Niggers is headed straight for hell. All dey think' bout is drinkin' hard likker, goin' to dance halls, an' a-ridin' in a old rattle trap car. It beats all how dey brags an' wastes things. Dey aint one whit happier dan folks was in my day.
"You black rascal," he said, "what've you bin up to?" "Didn't 'spect you back so soon. Boss," gasped the negro. "Said you wouldn't be back till termorrer." "No matter when you expected us back," said the Deacon, shaking him still harder, while Si winked meaningly at Shorty. "What d'ye mean by sich capers as this? You've bin a-drinkin' likker, you brute." "Cel'bratun my freedom," gasped the negro.
I'll bet my rifle aginst yourn ef I wanted so sorry a piece as yourn kin shoot that clost to the mark an' not spill no likker a-tall! An' ye can fill her two-thirds full an' put yer thumb in fer the balance ef ye like." "I'll just bet ye a new mule agin yer pony ye kain't: do nothin' o' the sort!" retorted Bridger. "All right, I'll show ye. O' course, ye got to hold still."
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