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When we got there the band was playing in front of the town hall and aunt Sarah said i cood stay out and hear it and then said i cood sit with Gim Wingit and Willy Swet if i wood behave. i said i wood and we lissened and after the band went in we went too. most all the seats were taken and we got some bully seats way up in front. i looked for father but coodent see him becaus the speakers hadent come in. well jest as soon as we got in the policeman was up in front and he said they has been to much whisling and stamping and the next one that whisles or stamps will get put out. well they was old Swane and Brown and Kize and Dirgin and every body kept quiet. after a few minits the band began to play hale to the chief and the speakers came marching up the middle ile. i looked for father but he wasnt there. evrybody began to clap and stamp and Gim and Willy asked me where my old man was. i stood up to see if he was there and jest then i saw the policeman a rushing at me. he grabed me by the collar and shook me round till i dident know which end my head was on and he draged me down the ile and threw me out. as we were going down the ile i saw Aunt Sarah running down the other ile as fast as she cood go with her bonnet on the back of her head and Keene and Cele and Georgie following along all bawling. she got out in the entry jest as he was going to put me out of the front door and she grabed me away from him and said you misable cowardly retch to treat a boy that way. he said i whisled and she said he dident and you knew it only you dident dass take ennyone else.
Deekon Gooch came down to the house with 2 of them. aunt Sarah was wating in her best dress and when she saw them coming she said Murder Joanna they is 2 of them, what shall we do, and mother said, mercy sakes what will George say. well the bell rung and i went to the door and asked them in and Deekon Gooch said they was Mister Fernald and Mister Robinson, he said they was his brothers. then Deekon he went off and i showed them to the front room up stairs and one of them asked me if i loved the lord and i said yes sir and he said i was a good boy. and then he asked me if i went to church and sunday school and i said yes sir and he asked me what was the tex last sunday and i said i dident know what tex ment and he said what did he prech from and i said he preeched from the pulpit in church and from the platform in sunday school, and Mister Fernald he began to laff and Mister Robinson he said i woodent laff if i was you brother, and then he said what does the minister say after the first prair and i said o yes i know now, he says we will now take up the usual colection and then Mister Fernald laffed again, then Mister Robinson he asked me how many sisters i had and i said 4 and he asked if they went to church and i said Keene and Cele sing in the quire and Georgie goes but Annie and Frankie and the baby was two little and then he asked if father went to church and i said not very often, only when Keene and Cele had to sing a duet, and then he asked me what else he did sundays and i said sometimes he made viniger down celler and sometimes he went over to see John Adams hens or down to Gim Melchers shop or up to Hirum Gilmores, and he said it is very deploorible is it not, brother and Mister Fernald he laffed again and said he gessed he better not ask me any more questions, and perhaps my father woodent like to have me tell all about him, and i said father wasent afrade, and he said he dident give much for ministers ennyway and then Mister Fernald laffed as hard as he cood and Mister Robinson looked mad, then we went down stairs and they shook hands with mother and aunt Sarah and Mister Robinson he set down by aunt Sarah and asked her about the church and prair meetings and why she dident always go and lots of things like that and Mister Fernald he got the baby in his lap and he talked to mother about the children and told us stories and he was jest buly. then bimeby father he came home and he shook hands with them and he said he was glad to see them whitch was a auful lie. then mother said super was ready and we all went in to super and father kept talking and telling stories until mother said George and looked at him, and he shet up and turned red and then Mister Robinson began to pray and all of us kept still but Georgie who began to gigle, and mother looked scowly at her and she shet up two. then father looked at mother and winked and i had to put my hand over my mouth. mother she almost laffed to, and Mister Robinson he kept on praying till bimeby Frankie he said Mama i wish that man wood stop and Mister Fernald he began to coff i bet he wanted to laff. well ennyway Mister Robinson he stoped. then father helped them to chicking and bisket and gelly and coffy and everything and then he helped us and we all begun to eat and bimeby Annie said we have got some napkins tonite, and Frankie said we have got some little plates to put the butter on, and i saw them first, and Annie said we have got some new goblets two, so there, and Frankie run his tung out at Annie and she made up a face at him, and then father told them to stop and they stoped and mother and aunt Sarah turned red and Mister Robinson he looked auful sollum and Mister Fernald looked funny and then he looked at father an begun to laff and father laffed and then we all laffed as hard as we cood, and Mister Fernald he said, dont mind a bit Missis Shute, i have got children of my own, i like Mister Fernald. after super Frankie and Annie were sent to bed and we went into the parlor and father kept us all laffing telling stories, and then Keene and Cele sung now i lay me down to sleep, and there is a bank on whitch the wild time grows, and Cele sung flow gently sweet Afton and Georgie sung i wood i were a fary queen, and then Mister Robinson wanted us to sing a religous song and we sung shall we gather at the river. then they asked me to sing and i said i coodent and father said before he thought, that boy is bedeviled to play a cornet, then Mister Fernald he said let him play it, it wont hurt him, then father begun to tell some more stories and kept us laffin fit to die, and Mister Fernald he said he hadent laffed so much for years, and he said, to mother, Missis Shute i gess you have a prety good natured husband, and she said yes, and father he said he most never got mad and jest then the bell rung, and Keene went to the door and said that Mister Swane the poliseman wanted to see father and father he went to the door and in a minit we herd him swaring and herd him say it is a dam lie Swane and you know it and then Swane went away and father came in and said that someone had ridden horseback over the concreek sidewalk and they tride to lay it on me.
Shute here has been thretened by some drunken rascal, and father looked aufuly surprised and said that is an infernal shame, when did it happen Isak, and Ike said about fifteen minits ago and father said we have been here about as long as that and i dident see the scoundrel. how did he look Isak, and Ike said i coodent see him very well George but he was a big man and he had a awfu deep voice and father said did he stagger enny and Ike said i coodent see wether he did or not but i cood tell he was drunk by his voice. so old Swain and old Kize went down behind the school house and off thru the carrige shop yard to see if they cood find him, and me and father walked home with Ike to protect him and father said now Isak if ennyone insults you again jest come to me and if i can catch him i will break every bone in his body, and father and Ike shook hands and Ike shook hands with me and then we went home and father began to laff and laffed all the way home and then he told mother and aunt Sarah and they said it was a shame to play such a trick upon him and father laffed all the more and said Ike hadent had so much exercise for a year and it wood do him good and give him something to think about. ennyway they said it was a shame to teech me such things, and father said he would rather i wood be tuf than be like Ike, and Aunt Sarah said i never wood be half as good as Ike for he never did a wrong thing in his life, and father laffed and said he dident dass to for his mother wood shet him in the closet. it was aufully funny, but i gess they was right. i shall never be half as good as Ike. i wonder if old Swane and old Kize have caught that man yet.
Upon this my son Swane invaded the coasts with several ships, and committed many outrageous cruelties; which, indeed, did his business, as they served me to apply to the fear of this king, which I had long since discovered to be his predominant passion.
This, it is true, he did by my advice; but as to her walking over nine plowshares red-hot, and giving nine manors, when she had not one in her possession, there is not a syllable of veracity in it. "The first great perplexity I fell into was on the account of my son Swane, who had deflowered the abbess of Leon, since called Leominster, in Herefordshire.
He was buried in the tomb of his mother, Swane ten Water, beneath a sarcophagus of stone that standeth in our church before the Altar of Holy Cross. In the same year, on the last day of August, and within the Octave of the Feast of St. Augustine, before Matins, died the humble and devout Laic, John Bobert, being forty years old.
To the venerable and devout Priors at Windesem and Mount St. Agnes near Zwolle, and to the Priests and Fathers unfeignedly beloved in Christ Jesus, these, from Brother Everard Swane of the House of the Blessed Virgin in the Wood near Northorn, your unprofitable servant, good Fathers.
Ike wears specks and always carries a little basket on his arm. he cant see very well, and father said to me, now you jest keep still and you will see some fun and when Ike came along father changed his voice so that it sounded awfully growly and said where in the devil are you going with that basket, and Ike was scart most to deth and said only a little way down here sir and father said, move on sir and move dam lively and i nearly died laffing to see Ike hiper. well after a while i see Ike coming back with old Swane and old Kize the policemen. i tell you i was scart but father only laffed and said you keep still and i will fix it all right. so when they came up he said to old Kize what is the trouble Filander and he said Mr.
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