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Th' Jews has th' first down fine, but all th' rest iv th' wurruld is at home in th' second. So Jools's all r-right as far as he goes. But he don't go far. "Well, whin Jools hear-rd that his frind th' butcher was sloughed up, he wint fairly wild. He says to himsilf, he says, 'I'll go home, he says, 'an' defy th' governmint, he says. 'I'll start a rivolution, he says.
Round his waist was sthrapped four hundherd rounds iv ca'tridges an' eight days' provisions. He car-rid a Mauser rifle on each shoulder, a machine gun undher wan ar-rm, a dinnymite bomb undher another, an' he was smoking a cigareet. 'Ladies an' gintlemen, he says, 'I'm proud an' pleased to see ye prisint in such lar-rge numbers at th' first rivolution iv th' prisint season, he says.
So whin I r-read in th' pa-apers that there was a rivolution startin' to fire Abdul Hamid, I says to mesilf: 'A fine chance ye've got, me lads.
Otherwise, Hinnissy, she might think she was as good as th' rest iv us. "Well, while th' sthreets in Rennes was packed with these dauntless souls, ar-rmed with death-dealin' kodaks, there was a commotion near th' coort-house. Was it a rivolution?
"F'r th' same reason that the Irish rivolution failed, th' polis stopped it. Th' con-spirators met in th' park an' were nailed be a park polisman. They didn't run in th' boy, but left him alone in th' place which was where his father wanst fought a battle. As he shtands there coughin' he begins to hear voices iv soops that followed th' ol' Impror. 'Comrade' says wan.
"And what 'll pay for it?" asked Mr. McKenna, in blank amazement. "This," said Mr. Dooley, whacking the pile before him. "Here's twinty thousand dollars iv th' bonds iv th' raypublic. Me cousin Mike put thim up with me f'r a loan iv five. He wurruked in th' threeasurer's office; an', whin th' polis broke up th' Irish rivolution, he put on his coat an' stuck a month's bond issue in his pocket.
"I wud not," said Mr. Dooley, hotly. "I niver overcharged a man in my life, except durin' a campaign." "No one accuses you of overcharging," explained Mr. McKenna. "Everybody would charge the same. It'd be the regular price." "If it was," said Mr. Dooley, "they'd be a rivolution. But I don't believe it, Jawn. Let me tell ye wan thing. Whisky is th' standard iv value.
'Thin, says me uncle Mike, 'I wash me hands iv th' whole invasion, he says. 'I'll throuble ye f'r me voucher, he says. 'I'm goin back to a counthry where they grow men that 'll stand up an' fight back, he says; an' he an' his la-ads wint over to Buf-falo, an' was locked up f'r rivolution.
'Come just as ye ar-re, he says. ''Tis an informal rivolution, he says. "An' away he wint. At sharp five o'clock th' rivolution begun. Th' sthreets was dinsely packed with busy journalists, polis, sojers, an' fash'nably dhressed ladies who come down fr'm th' Chang's All Easy in motocycles.
'I wish, said Jools, 'ye'd sind down tin or a dozen good men in uniform an' a few detectives in citizen's clothes, he says. "I've asked some ladies an' gintlemen to a five o'clock rivolution at my house, he says; 'an' I'd like to be sure they'll be no disordher, he says. 'Well, says th' chief, ''twill not be aisy, he says.
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