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Bai-ey Je-ove! there's Lizzie Dangler. Who's that man she's got in tow, ah?" "Hang Lizzie Dangler!" I exclaimed, impatiently. "Can't you answer a question for once in your life did you see them, or not?" "Weally, Lorton," said he, in quite an imploring way, "you needn't get angwy with a fellah, because he can't tell you what you want to know, you know! It's weally too hot for that sawt of thing.
By-and-by we returned; and whom should I then meet on my way home but, positively, my eye-glass acquaintance of Downing Street. Fancy his being out before nine o'clock in the morning! It was an unparalleled occurrence. "Hullo, Horner!" I sang out, "'morning, old fellow. Compliments of the season!" "Bai-ey Je-ove! Lorton, how you stawtled me 'do!"
Min at first did not join in, as she was not accustomed to the ways of us old habitues, but she presently participated, being soon as gay and noisy as any. What fun we had in blindfolding Horner, and manoeuvring so that he should rush into the arms of Miss Spight! What a shout of laughter there was when he exclaimed, clasping her the while, "Bai-ey Je-ove! Yaas, I've cawght you at lawst!"
"Bai-ey Je-ove!" exclaimed Horner, twisting his eye-glass round and making an observation for the first time the discussion before had been apparently beyond his depth, "Bai-ey Je-ove! Ju-ust what I was gaw-ing to say! Bai-ey Je-ove, yaas! But Miss Spight is much above human emawtion, you know, and all that sawt of thing, you know-ah!"
"Bai-ey Je-ove!" he said, after a long pause. "I ah, came akwass a vewy good one the othah day ah. A blind beggah had a bwoth-ah, and the bwoth-ah died; now, what welation was ah, the blind beggah to the ah, dead beggah?" "His sister, of course," said Bessie Dasher, promptly.
"Ah," said I, "he got that by letting other people's business alone!" "Bai-ey Je-ove!" said Horner, quite staggered at this second blow. "Vewy amusing anecdote, indeed! Thank you, Lorton. Much obwiged, and all that sawt of thing, for the in-fawmation. Yaas, bai-ey Je-ove! And so I'll say good day.
And, Bai- ey Je-ove! I say, old fellah," he added, almost dropping his drawl in his earnestness, "if I can help you in any way at all ah, I should weally be vewy glad ah!" The "us," whom I had "left ah," referred, of course, to officialdom; but, it was kind, wasn't it? There was old Shuffler, too.
"Well, then, I'll tell you, Horner," said I. "It was by minding his own business, my dear fellow." "Bai-ey Je-ove!" he ejaculated, adding, after a pause, "Weally, Lorton, you dawn't mean it?" "I suppose," I continued, "that you are also just as ignorant again how Mr Peabody made his second and greater fortune, eh?" "Yaas," he drawled out.
Their name is Clyde, and they have a good deal of money, I believe," said Bessie Dasher. "Bai-ey Je-ove!" exclaimed Horner. "I say, old fellah, p'waps they ah those ladies in hawf-mawning, ah?" "Dear me! this is quite interesting," said Miss Spight. "Do let me know what the joke is about ladies in half-mourning, Mr Lorton something romantic, I've no doubt."
I said, wheeling off abruptly at a right angle from the road we had been pursuing, and going out of my way in order to get rid of him. Flesh and blood could no longer stand his unmeaning, yet gibing platitudes. "Bai-ey Je-ove!" he exclaimed. "But, stawp, my deah fellah.
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