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Did you ever, he says, 'feel the avoirdupois power of gold not the troy weight of it, but the sixteen-ounces-to-the-pound force of it? "'Never, says I. 'I never take in any bad money. "Shane drops down on the floor and throws his arms over the sacks of gold-dust. "'I love it, says he. 'I want to feel the touch of it day and night. It's my pleasure in life.
Then there came the inspiration to write his poem on Sir John Franklin, and he had done so, winning the college prize for poetry. But no one had seen any change in him in those months; and, indeed, there had been little or no change, for he had an equable and practical, though imaginative, disposition, despite his avoirdupois, and his new purpose did not stir him yet from his comfortable sloth.
He will make his usual ecstatic remarks on the subject of figure, too. And I must confess," with modest self-satisfaction, "I must confess that those frills are not unbecoming. If we were only rich and married how I would dress, to please him! Being possessed of a figure, one's results are never uncertain. With the avoirdupois of Miss Jolliboy, life would appear a desert.
It is proposed simply to divide the pound avoirdupois into 10,000 parts instead of 7000, and to employ names at present in use for the minor denominations; but if it be thought incongruous to retain the term grain, which had reference to the weight of wheat or barley, minim might be substituted.
"But I doubt if I am any more devoted to such a banquet as we get every day than my beloved friend, Brother Adipose Tissue, and all the rest of the voyagers all over the world." "I plead guilty to the charge of Brother Avoirdupois; and I acknowledge myself to be a worshipper at the shrine of Mr. Melancthon Sage, and I invoke a blessing upon the head of Monsieur Odervie, the chief cook.
I have never seen the actual figures given on this subject, and in the interest of positive science, therefore, subjoin the following, which any one can easily verify for herself. The following articles, viz., merino and cotton drawers, flannel skirt, a light Balmoral, a short, light hoop, corsets, and dress-skirts, over and under, weighed 9lbs. 4oz. Avoirdupois.
This time it was the open flat cars, and the Germans came near being left. As the conductor shouted "all aboard" they both scrambled, with great puffing and blowing owing to their avoirdupois, to the rear end of the last car, and with faces purple from exertion plumped themselves down almost in the laps of some women who were laughing at them. We had now a dizzy descent to make to Lake Bennett.
"Yes, sir," Will managed to respond. "It is, then, as I fawncied, and doubtless was bestowed upon me as indicative of my lack of avoirdupois. And it was not entirely unnatural that they should do so, for at the time when I came to Winthrop I was very slight, very slight indeed.
Thus, 'the foot, the inch, the pole, the furlong, and the mile, shall bear the same proportion to the imperial standard yard as they have hitherto borne to the yard measure in general use. For the determination of weights, take a cube of an imperial inch of distilled water at 62 degrees Fahrenheit; let this be weighed with any weight, and let such weight be divided into 252,458 equal parts; then will a thousand of such parts be a troy grain, of which 5760 make a pound troy, and 7000 a pound avoirdupois.
It was that beautiful illustration of what human faith may accomplish; the familiar representation of Saint Elizabeth of Thuringia meekly displaying the contents of her apron before her lord, the Landgrave that heavy, sporadic type of whiskered ass whose only mission in life seems to be that of pulling the stars and all else down about his wassail-soaked head and ears through sheer avoirdupois and stupidity.
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