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"Which of you beat? Or should I say 'won!" she asked. Major Flint's long moustache was dripping with Lager beer, and he made a dexterous, sucking movement. "Well, the Army and the Navy had it out," he said. "And if for once Britain's Navy was not invincible, eh, Puffin?" Captain Puffin limped away pretending not to hear, and took his heaped plate and brimming glass in the direction of Irene.
The Puffin is included in Professor Ansted's list, but marked as occurring only in Guernsey and Sark.
And why did Captain Puffin leave that note on his table to say that he was suddenly called away, except in order to escape from the ferocious neighbourhood of his challenger? "The cowards!" ejaculated Miss Mapp. "They both ran away from each other! How blind I've been!" The veil was rent.
A fine-spirited woman, sir; you'll find the same." "I might if I looked for it," said Puffin. "But why should I want to make it up? You've done that, and that prevents her talking about duelling and early trains. She can't mock at me because of you. You might pass me back my bottle, if you've taken your drink." The Major reluctantly did so. "You must please yourself, old boy," he said.
"There I've been in the house opposite you these last two years, seeing your light burning late night after night, and thinking to myself, 'There's my friend Puffin still at it! Fine thing to be an enthusiastic archæologist like that.
Already the Major's hat was in his hand, and he was bowing low, so too were Captain Puffin and the Padre, while Irene, Diva and Evie were making little ducking movements.... Miss Mapp was determined, when it came to her turn, to show them, as she happened to be on the spot, what a proper curtsy was.
And before I'd had time to say, 'Hold on a bit, I was being led up and down the High Street, carrying as much merchandise as a drove of camels. God, sir, I suffered this morning; you don't seem to realize that I suffered; I couldn't stand any more mornings like that: I haven't the stamina." "A powerful woman," said Puffin reflectively. "You may well say that," observed Major Flint.
You might as well, you know; for if you do get a chance to camp down durin' the rush hours, along comes some fat lady and stands puffin' in front of you, or a thin, tired lookin' one who glares at you over the top of your paper. But if you're a standee yourself you feel free to look any of 'em in the eye. And, say, ain't we a glum, peevish, sour lookin' lot, here in New York?
"When I have any further orders," says he, puffin' out his face, "you will get them!" "Oh, slush!" says I. "Don't play so rough, Piddie." I was onto him, all right. I've seen these hot-air plungers before. They follow up a stock for weeks, and buy and sell in six figures, and reckon up how they've hit the market for great chunks but it's all under their lids.
You men always blame us poor women." "Well, upon my word, what's a game of golf compared with the pleasure of being with the ladies?" asked the Major, with a great fat bow. "I want to catch that tram," said Puffin quite distinctly, and Miss Mapp found herself more nearly forgetting his inebriated insults than ever before. "You poor Captain Puffin," said the Contessa, "you shall catch it.
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