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'Suffering from lumbago and rheumatiz' um, yes. 'Out of work' um, just so. 'Respectfully begs that the board will' etcetery and so forth. Well, gentlemen, what's your pleasure?" Darius Gott, he speaks first, and dry and drawling as ever. "Out of work, hey?" says Darius. "Mr. Chairman, I should like to ask if anybody here remembers the time when Ase was IN work?"
It wuz one of the most hilarious and vain places of revelry at the Fair, where there wuz lots of bally girls and etcetery, and I sez: "No, indeed! He may have gone into some meetin' house and wandered up into the steeple onbeknown to him, or some educational exhibit, or Bible rooms, but never, never in that place."
Ain't you never hearn as how misery loves company? The more miserable you are the more company you'll have, an' vice versey, etcetery an' the same." "Hush!" warned the blacksmith, in a harsh whisper. "He's a-comin'!" "City feller," grumbled Mr. Blake, affecting not to see. "Good-morning," said Harlan, pleasantly, though not without an air of condescension.
She kinder whispered back in a skairt way, sunthin' about "speculators and legislators and rings, and etcetery." But I answered right out loud, I hain't one to go whisperin' round, and says I, "I'll bet if Uncle Sam himself was here, and knew the feelin's I had for him, he'd hand out a few dollars of his own accord for me to get sunthin' to remember him by.
There it wuz, a order to remove a nuisence; and Josiah Allen had been a ridin' on it for a year, with pride in his mean, and haughtiness in his demeanor. Wall, I never see a man more mortified and cut up than Josiah Allen wuz. If he hadn't boasted so over its bein' gin to him on account of his bein' so smart and popular and etcetery, he wouldn't have felt so cut up.
But I told Sally Smith plainly, that I wasn't half so much interested in apple-parers and snow-plows, and the first sewin'-machine and the last one, and steam-engines and hair-pins and pianos and thimbles, and the acres and acres of glass cases containing every thing that wus ever heard of, and every thing that never wus heard of by anybody, and etcetery, etcetery, and so 4th, and so 4th.
Jest think on't, oh, my sect! who have been used to sneakin' up back stairs to look down on men seated in state at banquet tables, or peak from the gallery at the Capitol to see 'em nobly engaged in makin' laws to govern her, tellin' her how to spend the money she earned herself, and how long to send her to jail, and where and when to hang her, and etcetery; while she could only jest peak at 'em.
Now, for instance, one evenin' he asked me about 3,000 questions about the Atlantic Ocian, its whales and sharks and tides and steamships and islands and pirates and cable and sailors and coral and salt, and etc., etc., and etcetery; and after a hour or two he couldn't think of another thing to ask, seemin'ly.
Was this what he'd been droppin' good money in the education collection box for? Was this etcetery and so on. He'd be what the church folks say he will be if Fred don't go in for law. Fred, he comes back that he'll be the same if he does. So they disowned each other by mutual consent, as the Irishman said, and the boy marches out of the front door, bag and baggage.
And then there wuz a hull string of poetry dedicated to the heart-broken mother bewailin' the mystery on't, and wonderin' why Providence should do such strange, onlookedfor things, etc., and etcetery, and so 4th. And I spoke right up and sez, "That is a slander onto Providence and ort to be took as such by every lover of justice."
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