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I dare presoom to say I eppisoded more'n a hour to myself about it and to Josiah, 'tennyrate Josiah got real huffy and acted, and sez in a pitiful axent: "Samantha, I'm willin' to hear preachin' twice a week and can set under it like a man, but it comes kinder tough to have moralizin' and preachin' brung into the bosom of the family and liable to be drizzled out onto me week days, and any time, night or day."
And he said, "They never see Jerusalem," he said they wuz growed over in New Jersey, and when I asked him how he knew, he said he recognized the berries and the grain of the wood. But he couldn't no such thing, and I presoom the man told considerable truth.
Armstrong, but I have ended lemme see He began to count upon his fingers with an inward look. 'I have ended eight, he said. 'Do you wish to quarrel now? Paul demanded. 'Why, no, sir, no, said the Colonel; 'I am a man of peace. But when you presoom, sir, to dictate what a man shall drink, and when you presoom to object to the theme upon which he chooses to converse why, don't you see?
What wuz she a-thinkin' on as she done up that fore-top or braided that back hair? Did any hand ever lay on that soft, shinin' hair in caresses? I presoom more than like as not there had. Her mother's, anyway, and mebby a lover's, sence the fashion of love is older than the pyramids enough sight old as Adam, and before that Love wuz. For Love thought out the World.
Sez he, "I dare presoom to say, he thought I would be a sort of a ornament to his rooms kinder set 'em off. And you look respectable," sez he, sort o' lookin' down on me "Only you are too fat!" Sez he, "You'd be quite good-lookin' if it wuzn't for that." And then we had some words. And I sez, "It hain't none of our merits that angel looks at; it is his own goodness."
No, I guess it wuz the gray and wise old World a-instructin' the young Republic what to do and what not to do. The child looked dretful impetuous and eager, and ready to start off any minute, a good deal as our country does, and I presoom wherever the child wuz a-startin' for it will git there. A noble statute. Mr. Bitters did first rate.
Josiah sot store by Bismark, and honors his memory, and he seemed real tickled when I sez to him: "Bismark always reminded me of you, Josiah, from what I've read of him." Josiah was very tickled, and he sez with a proud happy look, "Yes, I spoze I am a good deal like him, he wuz as brave as a lion, had good sound horse sense and " But I sez calmly, "I dare presoom to say, Josiah, that that is so.
"If I had got a crick in my back?" I told him, "No, I hadn't got any crick, but I had proud and lofty emotions on the inside of my soul that no man could give or take away." "Wall," sez he, "you walked considerable like our old peacock when she wants to show off." I pitied him for his short-sightedness, but unconsciously I did, I dare presoom to say, onbend a little in my proud gait.
But it is no such thing; it don't begin, as I told him, with the Brooklyn Bridge; why, it hain't no longer than the bridge between Loontown and Zoar, or the one over our creek, but I presoom them who passed over this bridge to execution gin deep, loud sithes it wuz nateral they should so the bridge wuz named after them sithes.
Lots of jest such ones have importuned me for food on my Jonesville door-step. Then he had two Hindoo fakirs that wuz real interestin'. The fur-off Indian city, the river, and the fakir a-layin' in the boat, tired out, I presoom, a-makin' folks stand up in the air, and climb up ladders into Nowhere, and eatin' swords, and eatin' fire, and etcetry. He wuz beat out, and no wonder.
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