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For no one whom Rudolph Musgrave had ever encountered in the flesh had been really and profoundly wicked, Rudolph Musgrave considered; and so, he always gravely estimated this-or-that acquaintance, after death, to be "better off, poor fellow" as the colonel phrased it, with a tinge of self-contradiction even if he actually refrained in fancy from endowing the deceased with aureate harps and crowns and footgear.

Then Rosy would go up-stairs for a bit of pen-and-ink practice to cover a sheet with such words as these: Lady Rosamund This-or-that; Rosamund, Countess of Thus-and-so; the Honourable Rosamund Such-a-one. She lingered fondly over the baptismal "Rosamund"; what word could match more fitly with a title, or harmonize more completely with the grand old names of the peerage?

'Is th' riferee again thim? 'I can't make it out, he says, while a tear sthud in his eye. 'Whin I think iv Leonidas at th' pass iv Thermometer, he says, 'an' So-an'-so on th' field iv Marathon an' This-or-that th' Spartan hero, he says, 'I cannot undherstand f'r th' life iv me why th' Greeks shud have been dhruv fr'm pillar to post be an ar-rmy iv slaves.

This-or-That, the What-do-you-call-ems and others of the city's most exclusive but most garishly advertised society leaders had entered the house of mourning. It was a great show for the plebeian spectators.