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An' how we cheered in th' theaytre to see th' cute little sojers iv th' Mickydoo mowin' down th' brutal Rooshyan moojiks with masheen guns. An' fin'lly, whin th' Japs had gone a thousand miles into Rooshyan territory an' were about busted an' ayether had to stop fightin' or not have car fare home, our worthy Prisident, ye know who I mean, jumped to th' front an' cried: 'Boys, stop it.

A reg'lar Dempster's palace. The grandeur on it is a show and a pattern. Plenty to ate, plenty to drink, and a boy at the door with white buttons dotting on his brown coat, bless you like like a turnip-field in winter. Then the man himself; goodness me, the happy that man is Happy Joe they're calling him. Wouldn't trust but he'll be taking Kate to a theaytre.

"Took him into the theaytre lecture-room, sir, where there's little tables, and the young gentlemen writes out their exercises. That's what I did, sir," said Wrench triumphantly; and he looked hard at his master, who sat shaking his head at him solemnly. "What! Wasn't that right, sir?" cried Wrench. "Oh Wrench, Wrench, Wrench!" said the Doctor.

I don't need 'em all." "I likes I shall have one now," ventured Yetta, and Nathan ensnared one and put it in her hand where it "crawlied" most pleasingly until Morris Mogilewsky begged it for his Gold-Fish in their gleaming "fish theaytre." Then Eva shared with her friend and protege the delight of sharpening countless blunted and bitten pencils upon a piece of sand-paper.

Dooley; "on'y whin ye tell thim they're free they know we're on'y sthringin' thim." The AMERICAN STAGE "I've niver been much iv a hand f'r th' theaytre," said Mr. Dooley.

"Your gran'pa would have gone after you to the remotest end of this world, Miss Laura, if you'd so much as held your finger up to beckon of him. Your gran'pa spiled you, Miss Laura. A pretty thing it would have been if your pa had come all the way from India to find his only daughter gallivanting at a theaytre." Miss Dunbar looked at her old nurse with an arch smile.

He started, and his face lengthened with obvious disgust. "What's up now, lass?" said he. "I've business tonight. D'ye mind? Blessed if my mouth isn't as dry as a cinder-heap. You go home, like a good gal, and I'll take ye to the theaytre, perhaps, to-morrow. I haven't a minnit to stop. I didn't ought to be here now."

His mortified pride called for quicker solace. Rising to his feet with as much dignity as he could command under the twinkling eyes of the parson, he stuttered, "The capers! Making a dacent house into a theaytre! Respectable person, too one of the first that's going! So," facing the spectators, "just help yourselves home the pack of you!

"Well, if it is actin', it's oncommon ugly actin', I tell ye; a deal too nat'ral for my tastes, so I'd advise ye to drop it here, an' carry yer talents to a theaytre, where you'll be paid according to your desarts, Long Orrick." "Ah! the night air don't agree with ye, Coleman, so I'll bid ye good-bye," said the other, rising and quitting the hut.

Th' corryspondints iv th' English papers do not dare to go to bed befure nine o'clock on account iv rumors iv a gin'ral massacre. Madame Sara Bernhardt gave a magnificint performance at th' theaytre, an' was wildly cheered. It was believed in London, Budapesth, Posen, New York, Cookham, an' Upper Sandusky that Fr-rance is about to perish.