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John Straumann, however, who prided himself on his style, and had even changed his name to John because Jacob grated on his delicate ear, refused to be impressed. Committed bi-weekly by a member sounded almost jocose, he argued. 'Buy! buy! it sounded like a butcher's cry. Mr. Enoch, the kosher butcher, rose amid excitement, and asked if he had come there to be insulted!
'I will not order, said Solomon Barzinsky excitedly. 'I did not come here to be insulted. 'Insulted! quoth Straumann. 'It's you that must apologize, you illiterate icthyosaurus! I appeal to the President. 'You have both insulted me, was that worthy's ruling. 'I give the word to Mr. Mendel. 'But from both the combatants simultaneously. 'Order, order! from a dozen throats.
'If you'd only thought of that sort of "Buy! buy!" at the first! 'Order, order! said the Parnass. 'It would be more in order, said Straumann, 'to appoint an executive sub-committee to deal with the question. I'm sick of it. And surely we as a Synagogue Council can't be in order in ordering some of our members to buy out another. 'Hear, hear! His suggestion found general approval.
'And you can buy in my barometer with the rest, added Peleg. 'We could call a meeting of marine-dealers, said Barzinsky, disregarding him. 'We could say to them we must sacrifice ourselves for our religion. 'Tell that to the marine-dealers! murmured Straumann. 'And that we must buy out the Sabbath-breaker at any cost. 'Buy! buy! said Straumann.
'Don't you see from this insolent letter how right I was? The rascal threatens to drag us to the Christian Courts, that's clear. All that about Jerusalem is only dust thrown into our eyes. 'Grave-dust, murmured Straumann. 'Order! He is a dangerous customer. 'Shopkeeper, corrected Straumann. The Parnass glared, but took snuff silently.
'I don't wonder he laughed at us, said Straumann, encouraged. 'Bi-weekly by a member. Ha! ha! ha! 'Mr. President! Barzinsky screamed. 'Will you throw that laughing hyena out, or shall I? Straumann froze to a statue of dignity. 'Let any animalcule try it on, said he. 'Shut up, you children, I'll chuck you both out, said Ephraim Mendel in conciliatory tones.
'To-day, yes, but to-morrow there might be two. 'It could hardly be to-morrow, said the stylist. 'For that happens to be a Monday. Barzinsky bashed the table. 'Mr. President, are we here for business or are we not? 'You may be here for business I am here for religion, retorted Straumann the stylist. 'You you snub-nosed monkey, what do you mean? 'Order, order, gentlemen, said the Parnass.
'The point is what's to be done now, Mr. President? 'Nothing till the end of the year. When he offers his new subscription we refuse to take it. That can't be illegal. 'We ought all to go to him in a friendly deputation, said Straumann. 'These formal resolutions "Buy! buy!" put his back up. We'll go to him as brothers all Israel are brethren, and blood is thicker than water.
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