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'Why don't you send her to the hospital? said Vandeloup, with a yawn, looking at his watch. 'Never, retorted Mrs Pulchop, in a decisively shrill voice; 'their medicines ain't pure, and they leaves you at the mercy of doctors to be practised on like a pianer.

"She can make puddens and pies," the farmer went on, regardless of his auditor's gloom. "She's a lady, as good as the best of 'em. I don't care about their being Catholics the Desb'roughs o' Dorset are gentlemen. And she's good for the pianer, too! She strums to me of evenin's. I'm for the old tunes: she's for the new. Gal-like! While she's with me she shall be taught things use'l.

While I gazed, a voice close behind me said, in a wheedling drawl: 'Dew come in! You never saw sech a place! Why, upstairs beats this all out of sight. Sech parlours, with velvet chairs, and sofys, and a pianer; I tell ye Nebrasky beats some o' them stuck-up Eastern States!

"She can make puddens and pies," the farmer went on, regardless of his auditor's gloom. "She's a lady, as good as the best of 'em. I don't care about their being Catholics the Desb'roughs o' Dorset are gentlemen. And she's good for the pianer, too! She strums to me of evenin's. I'm for the old tunes: she's for the new. Gal-like! While she's with me she shall be taught things use'l.

"This yere alone is likely to brood an' hatch trouble; but, as if takin' a straight header into Hamilton's game ain't enough, this Colonel of mine don't get no pianer; don't round-up no music of his own; but stands pat an' pulls off reels, an' quadrilles, an' green- corn dances to Hamilton's music goin' on next door.

As this sharp says: Who gives Hamilton any license to go fillin' his hurdy- gurdy full of dance-music? S'pose this gent would come caperin' over an' set in a stack ag'in Hamilton for overloadin' his joint with pianer an' fiddle noises without his consent; an' puttin' it up he's out to drag the camp if Hamilton don't cease?

What eddication the gal gets at a school like that isn't worth a row of pins, and when they go away they don't know nothin' useful, nor even anything tip-top ornamental. All they've learned is the pianer and higher mathematics. As for anythin' useful, they're nowhere.

'Nay, Libby; yon's a natural sized waist hoo's nobbud small made, thaa sees, said the woman to whom the remark had been made. 'Well, aw'd ha' donned a bonnet on a Sunday. 'Yi; so would I. An' a married woman an' o' aw think hoo might be daycent. 'Yo're reet, lass; there is, an' no mistak'. 'Can hoo play th' pianer, thinksto? 'Can hoo dust one? 'Nowe, aw'll warnd hoo cornd.

"Think nothing of it," he said, looking more cocky than modest in spite of his words. "Where you want the pianer?" shouted one of the movers, and Mrs. Bullfinch bustled off to the living room. There did not seem to be any reason for Jerry to stay any longer. He had a feeling that Mr. Bullfinch, though still very polite, had things he wanted to see to.

There isn't one of them could bound New Jersey or tell you when Washington crossed the Delaware. 'That may be, sir, says I, 'but them higher branches comes useful. If Washington really did cross the Delaware, your little gal could ask somebody when it was, but she couldn't ask 'em how the pianer was played, nor what the whole multiplication table came to added up.