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When he felt his heead gettin' mazy, he consated he were fallin' asleep; his een gat that dazed he couldn't see t' squirrels no more, an' he thowt he mun be liggin' i' his bed at home under t' clothes. Then suddenly he bethowt him that he were fallin' asleep without sayin' his prayers.
But just then I heerd a buzzin' sound, an' I reckoned there mun be a waps somewheer about. An' a waps it were. He flew round an' round my heead, allus coomin' nearer an' nearer, an' at lang length he settled hissen reight on t' top o' my neb. An' wi' that I gav a jump, an' by Gow! there was I sittin' on t' bench in my 'lotment.
Richard! she said softly. 'Mr. Richard! He looked up. 'Well? What is it? 'Yo' scahr'd me; ah thowt summat 'ad come to yo'. What's wrong wi' yo', Mr. Richard? You look as if you could hardly he'd your heead up. To her surprise he spoke quite calmly. 'Yes, I've got a bit of a headache. Get me some hot water, will you? I'll have some brandy and go to bed.
But the rest of this speech was drowned in noise more eloquent than words, and then it broke into cries of "See thee! It is it's t' maester! and he has no! yea! he has he's gotten him. Polly, lass! he's fetched up thy Arthur by t' hair of his heead." It was strictly true. The school-master told me afterwards how it was.
You see, his mother had larnt him a prayer, an' telled him he mun say it to hissen every neet afore he gat into bed. Well, Doed aimed to say his prayer, but t' words had gotten clean out o' his heead. That made him a bit unaisy, for he were a gooid lad an' it hooined him to think that he'd forgotten t' words.
So I said to him: 'Doesta mean that heaven stands for Socialism, Abe? "But Abe laughed an' shook his heead. 'Nay, lad, he said, 'we haven't gotten no 'isms i' heaven. We've gotten shut o' all that sort o' thing. There's no argifying i' heaven. There's plenty o' discipline, but it's what we call self-discipline; an' I reckon that's t' only sort o' discipline that's worth owt.
But Jock," says he, waggin' his heead, "'twas not like ye to kape all that good dhrink an' thim fine cigars to yerself, while Orth'ris here an' me have been prowlin' round wid throats as dry as lime-kilns, and nothin' to smoke but Canteen plug.
There's no business doin' there'; and he shows him t' slates. So Beelzebub taks t' slates and looks at 'em, an' then he scrats his heead an' he says: 'I can't help it, your Majesty. It's Throp's wife; that's what's wrang wi' Cohen-eead. "'Throp's wife! Throp's wife! says Satan; 'an' who's Throp's wife to set hersen agean me?
We've bin short o' ham an' collops o' bacon all t' summer, an' if there's one thing I like better nor another it's a bit o' fried ham to my tea. "'Nay, thou mun bury t' pig, an' do without thy bit o' bacon, he says, and there was summat i' t' way he gave his orders that fair bet me. I went all o' a dither, while I hardly knew if I were standin' on my heels or my heead.
Did any of you go to Dearsley afther my time was up? He was at the bottom of ut all. 'Ah said so, murmured Learoyd. 'To-morrow ah'll smash t' face in upon his heead. 'Ye will not. Dearsley's a jool av a man. Afther Ortheris had put me into the palanquin an' the six bearer-men were gruntin' down the road, I tuk thought to mock Dearsley for that fight.
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