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"Ah!" sighed the woman of experience, "I called it nonsense too, my lady, afore Aaron, who now lies with the worms, laid me out with a flat-iron. Men's fit for jails only, as I allays says." "A nice opinion you have of our sex," remarked Archie dryly. "I have, sir. I could tell you things as would make your head waggle with horror on there shoulders of yours." "What about your son Sidney?
"This is the most difficult trick o' the lot," ses the conjurer, picking off a wheel wot 'ad stuck to the flat-iron. "Sometimes I can do it and sometimes I can't. Last time I tried it it was a failure, and it cost me eighteenpence and a pint o' beer afore the gentleman the watch 'ad belonged to was satisfied. I gave 'im the bits, too."
"But you can't possibly come in here, my love," she went on, drying her eyes. "Why not, my angel?" "Because of the parcels, dearest. And Heaven only knows what's underneath me at this moment, but it feels like a flat-iron. Besides," says she, like the prudent woman she was, "we've paid for two chaises.
An American flag floated from the prow, and behind the flag the universal types of progress everywhere goods for trade and a swivel-gun. Horses were led alongshore for hunting, and two pirogues sharp at prow, broad at stern, like a flat-iron or a turtle glided to the fore of the keel boat.
And finally from his cobbler's shop he egged after me boys with cudgels, that he might be rid of me.... Ouch! Ouch! Green and blue was I beaten, made an object of derision to the beloved woman, so drubbed and maltreated that no tailor's flat-iron can smoothe me out! Upon my very life an attempt was made! But I came out of it with sufficient spirit left to reward you for the deed.
They had implored a flat-iron from Serena for one of the weights, and she had also contributed a tin pail, which was curiously weighted also with small pieces of iron, so that it would sink in a particular way. It was believed that a certain uncommon little creature would be found in the flats farther down the river, and Mr.
But I turned and faced him then with the hot flat-iron in my hand, and burnin' indignation in my eys, and sez I: "If you mention that, Josiah Allen, in the meetin' house, or to any livin' soul on earth, I'll part with you." And I would, if it wuz the last move I ever made. But I gin up from that minute the idea of gettin' anything out of Josiah Allen for the fair.
Here's a pair of razors that'll shave you closer than the Board of Guardians; here's a flat-iron worth its weight in gold; here's a frying-pan artificially flavoured with essence of beefsteaks to that degree that you've only got for the rest of your lives to fry bread and dripping in it and there you are replete with animal food; here's a genuine chronometer watch in such a solid silver case that you may knock at the door with it when you come home late from a social meeting, and rouse your wife and family, and save up your knocker for the postman; and here's half-a-dozen dinner plates that you may play the cymbals with to charm baby when it's fractious.
I never want to see another, and you wouldn't, either, if you had to lie with a flat-iron tied to your ankle, as I do," said Jack, with a kick of the well leg and an ireful glance at the weight attached to the other that it might not contract while healing. "Well, I think plasters, and liniment, and rubbing, as bad as flat-irons any day.
You're just as likely to pack a flat-iron on top of a lookin' glass as to do the other thing. No, I'm the one to go to Mayberry. I must go by myself and you must stay here in London with her." "I can't do that, Hephzy," I said. "How could I?" "You couldn't, as things are, of course. But if they were different. If she was your wife you could. And then if that Solomon thing came you could "
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