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At the celebration of the festival of flagons, these two kept the feast together, and Apemantus saying to him, "What a pleasant party, Timon!" "It would be," he answered, "if you were away."
And his neighbours made him demarch, and he feasted them. And Apemantus came to deride him, and Timon bore with him; but he was impertinent to Timandra, and Timon beat him.
"Only," said Timon, "because you haven't a dog which I can imitate." "You are revenging yourself on your friends by punishing yourself," said Apemantus. "That is very silly, for they live just as comfortably as they ever did. I am sorry that a fool should imitate me." "If I were like you," said Timon, "I should throw myself away." "You have done so," sneered Apemantus.
And of the hundreds of English plays opening with an explanation or narrative of foregone matters, there is none where the formality is concealed by a more ingenious artifice than is used in this scene. Here also we have Apemantus introduced beforehand.
"Timon is infinitely dear to me," said another lord, called Lucullus, to whom he gave a beautiful horse; and other Athenians paid him compliments as sweet. But when Apemantus had listened to some of them, he said, "I'm going to knock out an honest Athenian's brains." "You will die for that," said Timon. "Then I shall die for doing nothing," said Apemantus.
"Farewell," said Alcibiades, who deemed that Timon's wits were lost; and then his disciplined soldiers left without profit the mine which could have paid their wages, and marched towards Athens. Timon continued to dig and curse, and affected great delight when he dug up a root and discovered that it was not a grape. Just then Apemantus appeared. "I am told that you imitate me," said Apemantus.
Apemantus was a man like that. Timon, you will be surprised to hear, became much worse than Apemantus, after the dawning of a day which we call Quarter Day. Quarter Day is the day when bills pour in. The grocer, the butcher, and the baker are all thinking of their debtors on that day, and the wise man has saved enough money to be ready for them.
It is true that his obstinate insistence on the universality of egotism produces a depressing and sometimes a fatiguing impression on the reader, who is apt to think of him as Shakespeare's Apemantus, "that few things loves better than to abhor himself." But when the First Lord goes on to add "He's opposite to humanity," we feel that no phrase could less apply to La Rochefoucauld.
"Will the cold brook make you a good morning drink, or an east wind warm your clothes as a valet would?" "Off with you!" said Timon; but Apemantus stayed a while longer and told him he had a passion for extremes, which was true. Apemantus even made a pun, but there was no good laughter to be got out of Timon.
I rooted my damper out of its matrix, flogged the ashes off it with a saddle-cloth, and placed it before my guest, together with a large wedge of leathery cheese, a sheath-knife, and the quart pot and pannikin. "Eat, and good dich thy good heart, Apemantus," said I cordially. Then, resuming my seat, I took leisure to observe him.
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