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He'd made th' gr-reat foreign iditor an' he'd be fine f'r th' job f'r he's best late at night. "Hogan says th' time has come f'r th' subjick races iv th' wurruld to rejooce us fair wans to their own complexion be batin' us black and blue. Up to now 'twas: 'Sam, ye black rascal, tow in thim eggs or I'll throw ye in th' fire. 'Yassir, says Sam. 'Comin', he says.

"They cudden't stand up befure a gr-reat, sthrong nation like ours." "We think we're gr-reat an' sthrong," said Mr. Dooley. "But maybe we on'y look fat to thim. Annyhow, we might roll on thim. Wudden't it be th' grand thing, though, if they licked us an' we signed a threaty iv peace with thim an' with tears iv humilyation in our eyes handed thim th' Ph'lippeens!"

'But there's wan thing missin' fr'm Molly's playing', he says. 'And what may that be? says Mrs. Donahue. 'An ax, says Slavin, backin' out. "So Donahue has took to dhrink." "Jawn," said Mr. Dooley, "'tis a gr-reat thing to be a polisman. Me frind Doheny, what used to be at Deerin' Sthreet, have got on th' crossin' an' they've planted him down be th' Audjitooroom.

"Th' pa-apers say, 'Two gr-reat fortunes united'; an', if that's it, they didn't need th' sarvices iv a priest, but a lawyer an' a thrust comp'ny. P'rhaps, with all th' certyfied checks, 'twas two rale people that was marrid; an', if that's so, it explains th' prisince if Father Murphy."

Ye might see him anny time wandhrin' through th' camp with a hatful of oats or a wisp of hay. They called him th' Stall Angel, and countless thousands iv sick hor-rses blessed him. He's a gr-reat man is th' Dock. But, if it hadn't been f'r Goold Bonds, th' counthry wud niver have had his sarvices. Who knows but that Mack's cat was th' rale victhor at Sandago?" "Didn't he cure anny men?" asked Mr.

"Ah," said Mr. Hennessy, the simple democrat. "It wud be all r-right if women'd do their own cookin'." "Well," said Mr. Dooley. "'Twud be a return to Jacksonyan simplicity, an' 'twud be a gr-reat thing f'r th' resthrant business." "It looks like war," said Mr. Hennessy, who had been glancing at the flaming head-lines of an evening paper over Mr. Dooley's shoulder. "It always does," said Mr.

"Th' Sicrety iv th' Threasury was followed be th' Gin'ral Shafter. 'Gintlemen, says he, 'it gives me, he says, 'gr-reat pleasure, he says, 'to be prisint in th' mist iv so manny an' so various vittles, he says.

I'll swear off on annything but Dorsey. He's a good man, an' I despise him. Here's long life to him." "Well, sir," said Mr. Hennessy, "that Alaska's th' gr-reat place. I thought 'twas nawthin' but an iceberg with a few seals roostin' on it, an' wan or two hundherd Ohio politicians that can't be killed on account iv th' threaty iv Pawrs. But here they tell me 'tis fairly smothered in goold.

They'se nawthin' ye can tell him. He thinks iv himsilf goin' back to Canton with a r-red necktie on, an' settin' on a cracker box an' tellin' th' lads whin they come in fr'm pitchin' hor-rseshoes what a hot time he's had, an' how he's seen th' hootchy-kootchy an' th' Pammer House barber shop, an' th' other ondacint sights iv a gr-reat city.

An he, poor man, whin some wan asts him, 'Did ye iver meet Dooley: 'll have to say, 'No, I had th' chanst wanst, but me ac-cursed pride kept me from visitin' him. "I r-read his speeches, though, an' know what he's doin. Some iv thim ar-re gr-reat.